Today is the first day of the college entrance exam, and especially since my forte - Chinese language - is being tested. The essay topic is truly f**king bizarre! It's so astonishing that I must record it! The following text comes from Zhou Luming's blog, "The Best Breast Enlargement Products of 2012," which I've reproduced verbatim! Simply because: I couldn't agree more with him - Massage for breast enhancement!!! Oh my God, I'm so glad I finished this exam years ago, hahaha! Nowadays, kids who have been coddled in honey jars finally evoke some sympathy from me!
Just now, an editor from SOHU sent me this year's college entrance exam essay topics, asking if I'd be interested in writing one. To be honest, I was quite enthusiastic about it since it's been years since I last wrote an essay, and my hands were itching to write. Back when I was in middle school, my favorite class was always the composition class. Since our composition classes were always combined into two sessions, perhaps the teachers all thought we should have more time to write essays. The reason I liked it so much was that I could usually finish within one class period, leaving the other free for me to "roam freely." Do you know how awesome it feels to have your article read aloud by the teacher in front of the whole class? Kids nowadays probably don't have such experiences anymore. I still remember how my teacher back then loved reading aloud the articles of a girl from the neighboring class, maybe because she was deeply influenced by a magazine called "Reader" at the time. She always wrote about window sills, afternoon tea, sunshine, coffee, etc. Every time she read her work, she would display a wise but unpleasant smile, with an unbearable and sharp tone.
But after a few years, these once disliked people or things have all become beautiful memories.
Let's continue talking about this year's essay topics. After checking out the national questions for this year, I really felt worried for these kids...
Here are the topics:
National Exam I: "Life: Poetic or Disillusioned"
National Exam II: "Help". Two examples were provided: One negative case where Cong Fei helped others but they didn't help him; and one positive example where a primary school student with leukemia helped others and they also helped him. Candidates can choose either topic to write on.
Beijing Exam: Different interpretations of "Spring Rain at Night" —— Write an essay, self-proposed title, no limit on genre, over 800 words.
Shanghai Exam: "Must Cross This Hurdle"
Liaoning Exam: "I Can"
Hunan Exam: "Poetic Life". Based on personal experience, write an essay titled "Poetic Life" with no less than 800 words. Genre requirement: Narrative or Argumentative Essay.
Shaanxi Exam: "Something Happened". Scene: A child falls down, surrounded by three adults representing society, family, and school respectively. All three say simultaneously "Something happened". Self-proposed title, no limit on genre, over 800 words.
Guangdong Exam: "Passing On"
Shandong Exam: "Time Will Not Erode Memory". Write an 800-word article titled "Time Will Not Erode Memory", self-proposed title, self-selected theme, self-selected genre, with clear genre characteristics.
Jiangsu Exam: "Dreaming About the Sky"
Zhejiang Exam: "Walking in Vanishing"
Fujian Exam: "Seasons"
Jiangxi Exam: Choose one: "A Pool of Autumn Water in My Heart" or "It's Hard to Say I Love You"
Hubei Exam: "Mother Tongue". Mother tongue is the first language a person learns. Everyone has their own mother tongue. Mother tongue is the carrier of national culture and the root of national survival and development. In today's era of diverse cultural competition and convergence, mother tongue is increasingly drawing universal attention. We communicate thoughts and feelings, appreciate literary works, and master scientific and cultural knowledge, all of which are inseparable from the mother tongue. It can be said that we feel, learn, and use our mother tongue every day. Write an essay based on the above material.
Tianjin Exam: "A Sentence Often on the Lips" (excluding poetry), no genre limit
Anhui Exam: "Carrying a Basket to See Mom"
Sichuan Exam: "Not One Step and a Lifetime, But a Lifetime and One Step"
Chongqing Exam: "Sweet, Sour, Bitter, Spicy Talking About College Entrance Exam"
First, I don't understand why there are so many different topics for the national college entrance exam. Is the regional difference in China getting bigger and bigger? During this time, except for Shandong and Zhejiang exams which are slightly innovative, the other topics are...
Firstly, National Exam I: "Life: Poetic or Disillusioned". I wonder if it's too early to ask an 18-year-old kid to discuss the disillusionment and poetic aspects of life. Are they capable? Are they qualified? At this age, they should have the most boundless passion and imagination. If they're already disillusioned now, what will happen in the future?! Moreover, I think putting together two unrelated terms like "disillusionment" and "poetic" just for the sake of rhyming is a gimmick. I'm 24 this year, and I haven't felt any connection between poetic and disillusionment. What about life? Please teach me.
National Exam II: "Help". Regarding "help", two examples were given: One negative case where Cong Fei helped others but they didn't help him; and one positive example where a primary school student with leukemia helped others and they also helped him. Candidates can choose either topic to write on.
I think this is actually a pretty hard article to write because the question setter doesn't even know what they're talking about themselves.
What does "helping others but not being helped in return" mean? Is help something that needs to be returned? Cong Fei was great, and his greatness lay in the fact that he didn't expect anything in return. You can curse those he once helped for not showing up when he needed help, calling them animals. Yeah, right.
But I want to say that true benevolent giving doesn't require reciprocation. I believe Cong Fei must have experienced a higher level of happiness during his silent giving. So what do you want us to discuss with this question? The value of help? I don't get it.
As for the case of the primary school student with leukemia, mutual help is fine. There's nothing wrong with the topic, but it's a bit shallow.
Beijing Exam: Different interpretations of "Spring Rain at Night" —— Write an essay, self-proposed title, no genre limit
Shanghai Exam: "Must Cross This Hurdle"
Let me try to write down Beijing's topic this time:
"Spring Rain at Night"
Tang Dynasty - Du Fu
Good rain knows its season, happening when spring arrives.
It sneaks in with the wind at night, moistening things silently.
Yeah! Good poem!!!
Regarding Shanghai's topic this time, it reminds me of my parents' generation, no, maybe even longer...
Liaoning Exam: "I Can" ... The coldest joke of the year.
Hunan Exam: "Poetic Life". Based on personal experience, write an essay titled "Poetic Life" with no less than 800 words. Genre requirement: Narrative or Argumentative Essay.
Hunan Education Bureau is really closely following the central government line, with similar topics.
You know that high school students' lives are boring, uninteresting, and even stupid. Facing cold desks and cold people every day, I don't know what poetic elements there are left. Is poetry really so worthless now? I think if the genre were changed to science fiction, it would be better.
Shaanxi Exam: "Something Happened". Scene: A child falls down, surrounded by three adults representing society, family, and school respectively. All three say simultaneously "Something happened". Self-proposed title, no genre limit, over 800 words.
This is really creative! Truly.
So creative that I don't even know how to write it!
Guangdong Exam: "Passing On"
Vague topics are disasters for gifted candidates.
Jiangsu Exam: "Dreaming About the Sky"
Don't understand.
Fujian Exam: "Seasons"
Are you writing a song?
Jiangxi Exam: Choose one: "A Pool of Autumn Water in My Heart" or "It's Hard to Say I Love You"
Can I not choose? They're both so dumb!
Hubei Exam: "Mother Tongue". Mother tongue is the first language a person learns. Everyone has their own mother tongue. Mother tongue is the carrier of national culture and the root of national survival and development. In today's era of diverse cultural competition and convergence, mother tongue is increasingly drawing universal attention. We communicate thoughts and feelings, appreciate literary works, master scientific and cultural knowledge, etc., all of which are inseparable from the mother tongue. It can be said that we feel, learn, and use our mother tongue every day. Write an essay based on the above material.
I think changing the topic would be better, as follows:
Hubei Exam: "Dialect". Dialect is the first language a person learns. Everyone has their own dialect. Dialect is the carrier of regional culture and the root of regional cultural survival and development. In today's era of diverse cultural competition and convergence, dialect is increasingly receiving widespread indifference. We communicate thoughts and feelings, appreciate literary works, master scientific and cultural knowledge, etc., all of which have left the dialect behind. It can be said that we forget, dislike, and abandon dialects every day. Write an essay based on the above material.
Tianjin Exam: "A Sentence Often on the Lips"
Chairman Mao's words are engraved in our hearts.
Anhui Exam: "Carrying a Basket to See Mom"
Actually, mom holds two baskets.
Sichuan Exam: "Not One Step and a Lifetime, But a Lifetime and One Step"
Not one step at a time, but each step is one footprint.
Chongqing Exam: "Sweet, Sour, Bitter, Spicy Talking About College Entrance Exam"
If I were a Chongqing candidate! I'd boycott the exam!!
Of course, the topics from Shandong and Zhejiang are really good. I think grammar is a superficial aspect of Chinese language, while literature is the key. These two topics can truly reflect the literary value of the candidates, very literary.
One is about hometown, the other about ancestral home, proud of it!
Anyway, I hope everyone can take the exam with style and at a high level. Since we are not the rule-makers and don't have the guts to end the game, let's try our best.
College entrance exam, screw it!