The teacher asked the students: "Since ancient times, who does not have poop? You continue the next sentence." The student answered: "Who poops without using paper?" The teacher got very angry and made the student stand as punishment. At this moment, the teacher saw snow falling outside the window and regretfully said: "The heavens make it snow but not rain, the snow turns into rain when it hits the ground. How troublesome it is when it turns into rain, why didn't it just rain in the first place?" The student said: "Teacher eats food but not poop, the food turns into poop after reaching the stomach. How troublesome it is when it turns into poop, why didn't you just eat poop in the first place?" The teacher fainted on the spot!
AA confides: "I've fallen for a girl who's 6 years younger than me and is still in school. This is really a sin."
BB replies: "It would truly be a sin to remove the words 'like'."
CC replies: "It would truly be a sin to remove the words 'younger than me'."
DD replies: "It would truly be a sin to remove the words 'like', 'younger than me', and 'school'. All six of them."
Girlfriend: "Can we break up?"
Boyfriend: "No."
Girlfriend: "Why?"
Boyfriend: "If you bought a steamed bun and took a bite, would they exchange it for you?"
Girlfriend: "But you're not as good as I imagined!"
Boyfriend: "If you bought a steamed bun, you originally wanted a meat-filled one, but mistakenly took a vegetable-filled one. After biting into it, if they won't exchange it for you, would you throw it away? Just make do with eating it." Girlfriend: "(⊙o⊙)...=^_^=.. (Forward this to your loved one and you will be together forever)"
Another version:
Girlfriend: "Can we break up?"
Boyfriend: "No."
Girlfriend: "Why?"
Boyfriend: "If you bought a steamed bun and took a bite, would they exchange it for you?"
Girlfriend: "But you're not as good as I imagined!"
Boyfriend: "If you bought a steamed bun, you originally wanted a meat-filled one, but mistakenly took a vegetable-filled one. After biting into it, if they won't exchange it for you, would you throw it away? Just make do with eating it." Girlfriend: "(⊙o⊙)...=^_^=.. (Forward this to your loved one and you will be together forever)"
A boss had just gotten off the plane, and a reporter asked: "What are your thoughts on three-accompany services?" The boss was surprised: "Are there also three-accompany services here?" The next day, the newspaper published: "A certain boss arrived at the location and immediately asked if there were any three-accompany services available."
2. Reporter: "What are your thoughts on the three-accompany issue?" Boss: "Not interested!" Newspaper published: "A certain boss has high nighttime entertainment requirements; local three-accompany services suffer from cold treatment."
3. The boss became furious and said to the journalist, "I'll sue you in court!" Newspaper published: "A certain boss gets angry over three-accompany issues."
Two brothers were being chased by a tiger. The younger brother couldn't run anymore and said, "Brother, let's stop running and fight this beast to death." The older brother replied, "Don't talk nonsense, if I can't outrun it, I just need to outrun you."
A very wealthy woman hired three bodyguards to protect her grain warehouse, gold warehouse, and silver warehouse. The first bodyguard proudly said, "I guard the grain!" The second bodyguard proudly said, "I guard the gold!" The third bodyguard, feeling upset, said, "My... my... I quit!"
LZ: My last name is Gao, and my girlfriend's last name is Guo. Please help come up with a nickname that's easy to remember and reflects both our last names.
Reply: High-pressure cooker.
When I first learned how to ride a bike, I was wobbling all over the place, but I was completely addicted. One day, I was practicing in the neighborhood square when suddenly I lost control of the handlebars and couldn't steer properly. There was an old man walking in front of me. I desperately shouted: "Grandpa, don't move, don't move, absolutely don't move..." The old man stood frozen in fear, but after zigzagging around, I still collided with him. The old man was extremely angry and said something that made me laugh for life: "Why did you tell me not to move? Were you aiming?"
Question: Snake mating can last for 12 hours, what are your thoughts on this?
Answer: Doctor Xuan is really amazing!
Destiny is like rape, if you can't resist, you must learn to enjoy it! Work is like having sex, when you can't perform, others will take over! Life is like masturbation, everything depends on your own hands! Studying is like visiting prostitutes, after paying the money, you still have to exert effort! Salary is like menstruation, if it doesn't come in a month, you'll be shocked! Negotiation is like having sex, no matter how much you talk, the gains are minimal! Donations are like arousal, once you think about it, you want to act right away! Bonuses are like pubic hair, they fall out more than they grow! Leaders are like having sex, always bullying the weak and fearing the strong! Meetings are like having sex, it's unclear who should initiate! Brothers are like condoms, they'll cover up any trouble for you! Not replying to posts is like impotence, even though you enjoyed it, there's no action!!
An elder lives with three generations under one roof. One day, he bought a dish called "bull penis" on his way home.
During dinner, the daughter-in-law noticed the peculiar appearance and unique taste of the dish and asked: "Dad, what's this dish called?"
The father-in-law hesitated to explain and said: "Just eat it, don't ask so many questions!"
The daughter-in-law pressed further, so the father-in-law reluctantly replied: "It's from an animal!"
The daughter-in-law asked again: "Do you have it?"
The father-in-law answered: "Yes!"
The daughter-in-law then asked: "Do I have it?"
After some thought, the father-in-law replied: "Sometimes yes, sometimes no!"