Establishing and protecting interpersonal relationships requires patience, which is somewhat similar to the principle of fishing. The basic techniques of fishing can be briefly introduced through its "trilogy": ① Bait preparation and casting: Just from the choice or making of bait, one needs strong judgment: like knowing what kind of food the fish you want to catch prefers (i.e., what can stimulate their desire): whether the bait will be more effective, etc. Casting should find the right "fish pond" (i.e., location) and appropriate opportunity. ② Guarding the rod: In this stage, first, one must have patience; people shouldn't be too eager for quick success ("expecting to see a fish as soon as the line is cast"). Second, one must remain calm; giving the "fish" just a little "treat" may not be enough to deceive it, perhaps the other side is testing if it's safe. ③ Reeling in: This is the most critical moment; the situation where the meat is at your lips but you can't eat it mostly happens at this time. One must remain inconspicuous; once you slightly reveal your true nature or become too hasty, all efforts will be wasted. A seasoned person will certainly adjust appropriately, maintain a balance between tension and relaxation, fully stimulate the other party's interest, let the hook go deeper into the mouth, making the fishing more secure. Besides the basic techniques, attention should also be paid to feeding small fish to grow them bigger, using longer lines, and other fishing strategies, which means not neglecting emotional investment in friends, colleagues, and others around you in daily life.
1. Long-term Investment for Big Returns
In the capital city during the Tang Dynasty, there was a man named Dou who was intelligent and very good at managing finances, but he lacked capital to fully utilize his skills. Therefore, he started earning from smaller opportunities.
Those skilled at long-term investment and big returns, when they see a big fish on the hook, do not rush to reel it in immediately. They suppress their excitement, calmly reeling in a few times to slowly bring the fish closer to the shore; once the big fish struggles, they loosen the line again, letting the fish swim around a bit before slowly reeling it back in. By alternating between pulling and loosening, when the big fish is exhausted and unable to struggle further, only then do they pull it close to the shore and use a net to drag it onto land. Managing human relations is similar; if you pursue too aggressively, others might outright reject your requests. Patience is key for success to come.
When seeking help or building friendships, one should have a long-term perspective and focus on purposeful emotional investments over time. Moreover, with long-term strategies, one must also have the discernment to identify capable individuals, so as not to waste effort on those who look good but are useless, ensuring future returns.
2. Feeding the Fish You've Caught
As the saying goes, "You don't need to feed a fish once it's caught," reflecting many people's mindset. Their interpersonal dealings are often too focused on immediate gains. This short-sightedness completely violates the principle of catching big fish. Think about it: if you don't even feed a small fish, how will it grow into a big fish?
You might have had such an experience: when you encounter a difficulty, you think someone can help you, and you originally wanted to approach them immediately. But then you remember that in the past, there were many times when you should have visited them, but didn't. Now that you need their help, would it be too abrupt to approach them? In such a situation, you inevitably regret not having maintained the relationship earlier.
Modern life is busy, leaving little time for excessive socializing. Over time, many once solid relationships become loose, and friendships gradually fade. This is unfortunate. It is hoped that everyone cherishes the precious connections between people, and even when busy, does not forget to communicate emotionally.
Chinese people often criticize those who seek help only when needed, summarized by the phrase, "Not burning incense regularly, but suddenly praying when in trouble," or "Friends when needed, strangers otherwise." This is purely short-sighted. As the saying goes, "Burn incense regularly, and you'll have help when needed," or "Be kind on sunny days, and you'll have an umbrella when it rains." Truly skilled seekers of help always have a long-term strategic vision, preparing early, and planning ahead. Thus, in times of urgency, they receive unexpected assistance.
Entertaining or giving gifts to those who have direct interests related to you involves knowledge. How to entertain, how to give gifts, when to entertain, or when to send gifts, all require understanding.
After someone has helped you, sending a gift afterward might make them feel it's expected. However, if you entrust someone with a task beforehand and present a gift ceremoniously, the recipient’s perception changes significantly. The results of giving gifts to a newly appointed general manager versus a general manager about to leave differ markedly. Giving a gift to someone who was once your superior but is about to transfer to another department for a different role will make them extremely grateful.
This article is sourced from: Wang Shi's highest level of management philosophy "effortless governance"_7154.www.zp-nmg.com Manipulating intelligence monitoring competitive environmental changes_7638 Structured interview examples and analysis_7711.www.zp-nmg.com