Modern people, with an accelerated pace of life, face work pressures and life pressures like two great mountains that leave them breathless. Opportunities and risks test people, making their nervous emotions easily triggered. This suppressed emotion needs an outlet; people desperately need to ease their tense nerves. Stretch marks and extramarital affairs may well be the products of such a state. Of course, the increase in social opportunities and the infiltration of Western civilization also play a part.
Men and women strive tirelessly for their careers, jobs, promotions, and to keep their livelihoods. Often, both partners neglect each other's feelings and ignore emotional maintenance. Over time, what was once mutual affection turns into dissatisfaction and complaints. Husbands are no longer the respected figures in their wives' eyes, and wives are no longer the gentle beloveds in their husbands' eyes. Both parties are in a state of dissatisfaction and discomfort.
Thus, men and women urgently seek a breakthrough from this confined state. It could be a fleeting encounter or a deepened affection over time. When a gentle and understanding woman appears by his side, a man regains his self-respect, finding solace for his heart as ambiguous feelings gradually grow within him... The same applies to women. When physically and mentally exhausted, a word or action from a man who understands and cares for her might awaken long-dormant warmth, helping her regain confidence. At this point, both men and women enter a rather subtle psychological state, subconsciously paying attention to their image while concealing bad tempers and flaws. A positive cycle makes both quite satisfied. If it stays at this level without excessive expectations, it can serve as a good way to adjust one’s mindset. However, if either party takes it too seriously, this temporary balance will soon be broken—a sign of divorce.
The high divorce rate in today's society has extramarital affairs as a significant factor. Men and women in extramarital relationships have different thought patterns and behavioral tendencies. Most men treat this relationship as a landscape, a form of entertainment. They are full of joy when involved but, upon returning home, still want to maintain their main family. In contrast, most women take it too seriously. Once invested, they feel this man is their true reliance. They would give up their families and reputations for this man.
Before stepping into the marriage hall, we should clearly understand the principle that falling in love is easy, but living together is hard. The disturbances of trivial daily chores and the disappearance of distance make marital relationships mundane. Weak love does not strengthen during shared hardships; instead, past beautiful impressions gradually fade. If both parties rationally recognize this and responsibly create a harmonious family atmosphere, even if love cannot withstand the erosion of time, it transforms into familial affection—an irreplaceable, unseverable bond that can last a lifetime.
When young, amidst the struggles of life, I once thought about divorce when I felt I could endure no more. To support my children, I maintained this belief to sustain our marriage. After weathering many storms, looking back at the path we've walked, the things we've done, and the words we've said, I realized my immaturity, lack of empathy, and impatience. Originally, much of the past unhappiness was due to my own considerable mistakes. Thankfully, that belief brought us to today. When we gained clearer self-awareness and greater understanding of each other, we learned mutual tolerance, making life's march lighter and more relaxed.
I once understood marriage like this: Life is short; why waste it on harming each other when there is no more love? Walking away leads to another sky, another life that needs to end so that a new page can begin—perhaps that's where true happiness and destiny lie. Now reflecting, this idea was overly naive. Since eternal love doesn't exist, why chase it recklessly? Cherish the happiness before you, adjust your mindset. When you want to change the other person, try changing yourself first. Love requires tolerance and sacrifice. A person already faces many temptations and helplessness in society, enduring great pressure. Home should be a warm harbor, offering tenderness and understanding to each other, sowing elements of happiness for oneself. Interactions affect emotions mutually. Be the source of good mood and create a positive family atmosphere.