Prologue
In one's life, there are always some people who leave an indelible mark. They go from being strangers to acquaintances, through the journey of knowing each other, reaching the sweet stage of love. But in the end, they part ways and embark on separate journeys of liking others. At this moment, they once again become strangers.
Some say they once loved each other, while others claim they hurt each other. Thus, came the phrase "love until it hurts"; some say distance is no problem as long as they truly love each other, while others argue that distance disrupts their loving thoughts. Hence, the saying "love stranded by distance".
We are the post-90s generation, and we too have our own version of love. Yet, in the face of certain situations, we sometimes even defy our own wishes but act with perfect rationality. I wonder if we have been deceived by something, numbing our nerves. For some matters, we are overly cautious yet pretend not to care at all. Perhaps, in everyone's eyes, there is confusion and bewilderment.
Our era inevitably has its little problems. Regarding love, we all have unique perspectives. When giving advice to others, we sound so insightful, but when these events happen to us, we feel like the world is spinning out of control, even getting stuck in a rut. The phrase "passing through countless flowers without a single leaf clinging to me" once sounded so carefree, but now it seems far away. What was once "not hanging oneself on one tree" has become a complicated excuse.
Facing our own feelings, we are so irrational that even though we love each other, in the end, we bury each other's hearts. The moment we turn around and leave, we suddenly realize, regretting our former naivety and mischief, regretting our pretense of not caring. We didn't just hurt a heart; we harmed what the other person considered more important than life itself. Perhaps, we just wanted to upset the other person to make them care, but doing it too often loses all meaning.
After reading so many novels and watching TV dramas about love, we finally gained a hasty understanding of it. But even if we possess love, we don't necessarily know how to nurture it. Loving someone is simple, and mutual love isn't difficult either. The challenge lies in consistently walking together, without arguments or awkwardness, every day filled with warmth and happiness. I think that's hard, remaining in each other's hearts until old age. That's what love is.
Thinking back, during our naive years, Nine Inch Nails' movie "Those Years, Together We Chased Girls" became a massive hit, earning immense popularity. The reason? It told a true story, vividly recreating the youthful details of Ke Jingten and Shen Jiayi's relationship, which precisely evokes admiration.
Each of us has our own story, a memory that remains untold and unnamed. This is akin to a little-known secret that cannot be spoken. We constantly disguise the gloom in our hearts, despite the sunshine on our faces tinged with slight blushes, yet we still bury that emotion. Maybe because we lack Nine Inch Nails' charm, we don't get the chance to adapt our memories into an engaging story. But I think that's fine; at least both people remember and can recount how things were back then.
But, that Shen Jiayi hidden deep in our hearts, the girl who makes us dream endlessly, with big eyes and a pouting mouth, do you still clearly remember her? Although not everyone is as lucky as Ke Jingten, who could play and release Kongming lanterns with her in the snow. Even if given the chance to yearn for her day and night, Ke Jingten ultimately couldn't hold her hand and accompany her till the end.
But those people, those memories, those stories, we must remember, because in the bloom of youth, they walked alongside us. These moments alone are enough for the other person to recall.
When we made grand vows about love, we were struck by "Beijing Love Story." We thought love was supposed to be that way, but at this point, we had no choice but to change our optimistic view of love. Love, at times, can become worthless. These are unforeseeable. Undeniably, those seemingly empty loves conceal a small secret. Sometimes, love is so fragile. These moments leave us without any fleeting warm memories.
I really don't know how to comment on the complex love between them. Real-life simple love already causes headaches, let alone those complicated love chains. Actually, real life exposes our false views on love, but can we qualify ourselves for the ones we love? I believe this is not just their story but also ours to face in the future.
As we grow up, various people keep entering our lives wearing different masks. How should we respond? Friendship, love, how do we handle them? We are growing up, maturing, but when it comes to love, we seem extremely naive.
Some people like to reminisce, recording their beautiful pasts in diaries. Even if that fleeting romance burned their eyes and shattered their weary hearts, those little moments, those warm instants, will last forever. That's love. A heart-stirring segment leaving laughter and joy, ultimately escaping a tragic end.
In a lifetime, with love, pain is inevitable, but it is intertwined with warmth and happiness. The reason for pain lies in pursuing the wrong thing.
Love is like the tide, leaving behind many eternal moments amidst its ebb and flow.
Love is simple. As long as the beloved is happy, that's enough.
Content Summary
Nowadays, in the real world, each of us plays our own brilliant role, squandering our youth. We might feel that among all living beings under heaven, many emotions are pessimistic. Even if wasted, the feelings we put forth remain unchanged.
It feels like only a few short years ago when, after living carefree days, we watched "Snail House," plunging our mood to rock bottom; just as we escaped those pessimistic and world-weary sentiments and felt love was sweet, waiting for "The Pursuit of Happyness," "Beijing Love Story" dealt us another heavy blow. We should have enjoyed the happiness destined for the post-90s generation, but instead, we silently struggled in the world of emotions.
Faced with this complex world, Jimmy, a child daily wrestling with emotional dilemmas, harbors some animosity towards anything. His loneliness can only be expressed through a pen, revealing a soul as murky as a stream beneath his vulnerable inner world. He wears a smile full of happiness daily, so fake, so mature, until the smile strains his upturned lips, forcing him to calm down and confront his silent world. He likes writing poetry but often asks himself, "Who is my warm reader?"
Life always welcomes its own prosperity unexpectedly. Not to mention "thirty years east of the river, thirty years west," even a year, or a month, can bring unexpected surprises. Thus, a girl with a perpetual smile entered Jimmy's world. Her name is Jiani. She comes from the beautiful Sunlight City—Lhasa. Jiani sticks closely to Jimmy, simply because he sits next to her. Eating together, studying together, Jiani learns many secrets Jimmy doesn't share with others. Perhaps, over time, Jimmy slowly falls for Jiani. But he dares not tell her, fearing their friendship would lose value due to his words.
As days pass, Jimmy writes poems for Jiani, and she pretends not to understand their meanings. In fact, no one knows that Jiani also enjoys writing poetry. She is very familiar with Nalan Rongruo, so how could she misunderstand Jimmy? But she dares not cross the line. Both fear their friendship might collapse.
Perhaps destiny enjoys playing jokes on Jimmy. One day, Jiani receives notice to attend a high school in Beijing. Faced with this situation, both cry, unlike before. Now, Jimmy holds back his tears, unwilling to let Jiani worry; whereas the formerly strong Jiani can no longer suppress her sorrow, sobbing loudly as if facing a life-and-death farewell.
On the night Jiani was about to leave, sitting quietly on the cool bench by the lotus bay where they used to stay, silence prevails. Occasionally, she utters phrases like "tomorrow is long," but Jimmy knows well that perhaps after this separation, he will never see Jiani again. Or, tonight, if he doesn't speak, what if Jiani finds a boyfriend in Beijing? Growing sadder, Jimmy cries out loud, "Talented scholars drift away with the wind, leaving you alone to listen to whom?" Jiani laughs, holding Jimmy's arm for the first time, calmly saying, "Idiot, we'll meet again, don't you have more to say to me?" Jimmy blushes furiously.
That night, they talk late into the night. The stars shine brightly, and moonlight spills like scattered rice grains. The mottled shadows cover the uneasy hearts about to part. Then, in the quiet, Jiani hands Jimmy an intricately designed box, forbidding him from opening it immediately. Thus, exhausted, they return to their dormitory to rest.
Back in the dormitory, Jimmy can't resist curiosity and hastily opens the box. However, he finds a note telling him not to read it now. So, Jimmy puts the box away carefully. Perhaps Jiani anticipated Jimmy's inability to resist curiosity, hence the warning.
The next morning, Jimmy wakes up early, carrying Jiani's bags and seeing her off onto the bus. Jiani doesn't look back, afraid to meet Jimmy's eyes wanting to keep her, simply waving goodbye with a "Tashi Delek." The bus soon disappears in the blurred vision.
After seeing Jiani off, Jimmy quickly returns to the dormitory and opens the box left by Jiani. Instantly, Jimmy is stunned, realizing how important he was to Jiani. Unfortunately, they missed the intimate timing. Life goes on monotonously.
In the days they don't see each other, Jimmy and Jiani still stay in touch, everything peaceful and good. They express their sweet love through letters. They don't mind the distance, innocently believing that as long as they cherish each other, the distant separation won't stop their longing.
I want to ask you, do you believe the statement that distance is no issue? You may agree, but distance does widen emotional gaps. In the loneliest days, one is easily influenced by others. In Jimmy's low moments, a similarly empathetic girl appears. Jimmy confides his love for Jiani to Anna, even showing her the poems written for Jiani. Thus, Anna understands the overweight yet emotionally complex Jimmy. She treats Jimmy sincerely.
However, spending too much time together, Jimmy unintentionally falls for Anna. But although Anna is kind to Jimmy, she doesn't reciprocate his feelings. She just feels Jimmy is a good person suitable for lifelong friendship.
Jimmy lost Jiani but couldn't win Anna. Jimmy's heart grows cold. In these dark days, he frequently argues with the adorable Anna, and thinking of Jiani, Jimmy feels guilty. Jimmy struggles in the whirlpool of emotions, unable to find a way out. Watching Jimmy's daily worries, Jiani feels deeply for him, but what can she do? She herself doesn't know. Perhaps neither knows what Jimmy truly wants.
Ultimately, Jiani chooses to leave, going to an unfamiliar city, escaping the world's catharsis, but she can't forget those beautiful memories, a fragile sentiment lasting long. Thus, she quietly writes "Goodbye, Jimmy" in her notebook, beginning the story here.
Chapter One: The Noisy Classroom
"Ding ding ding..."
The bell rang like a funeral toll. Students reluctantly returned to their seats, preparing for the most disliked Chinese class. Everyone has favorite subjects, but Chinese is unanimously despised in the class, winning the title of "King of Boredom" in the boring subject elections.
Jimmy, a short boy with slightly dark skin, lacked excessive love in childhood, making him bold in everything. Due to lacking listeners, he records his life's bits and pieces with a pen. He likes reading and writing, always quietly staying in the corner of the front row, reading his favorite novels and feeling melancholy.
As usual, Jimmy takes out a novel, opens it, and lays it flat under the textbook. Despite trembling nervously, he reads with great interest. The classroom remains chaotic, and the Chinese teacher continues writing on the blackboard.
"Dong dong dong..." A sudden knock on the door makes the originally quiet classroom slightly disordered. Students whisper, guessing what will happen next. But none of this affects Jimmy, immersed in his novel.
"Teacher Sun, this is Jiani, a student transferred from the National Middle School, here to study Mandarin. Please arrange a seat for her," says Principal Yang, followed by a girl with a ponytail, slightly dark but beautifully so, like a delicate jade carving, catching everyone's eyes. Surprisingly, this girl walks directly to the seat beside Jimmy, vacant for several months.
Jiani quietly places her bag, sits down, and refrains from disturbing the seemingly tranquil boy next to her. Meanwhile, Jimmy doesn't look up to check what's happening. Jiani also quietly takes out her textbook and starts reading.
At this moment, Teacher Sun walks up to them, asking Jiani some questions. Seeing Jimmy flipping through a magazine under his textbook, the teacher doesn't intervene but coughs lightly. Jimmy seems to anticipate something, skillfully placing the magazine in his drawer. Looking up, he discovers a surprisingly attractive girl next to him but pretends to be indifferent.
"Ding ding ding..." The long-awaited bell finally rings. Some mischievous children rush out of the classroom, either peeking into other classes for their crushes or hiding in the restroom to smoke. Of course, curious students discuss Jiani.
"You, hello, my name is Jiani, nice to meet you," Jiani introduces herself in broken Mandarin, extending her hand. The long-silent Jimmy is at a loss, blushing profusely.
"My name is Jimmy, hello," he mutters, barely touching Jiani's hand before recoiling as if electrocuted. Jiani, however, secretly smiles at this bashful boy.
"Jimmy, no wonder you chose to sit alone, obviously expecting such a handsome kid to accompany you!" Cai Ni teases maliciously. Instantly, the entire classroom bursts into laughter, but Jimmy silently sits down and reads his favorite magazine.
This break is so unrestrained. Teachers are all in meetings, merely assigning symbolic homework via the class representative. In reality, teachers know these assignments are insignificant but not assigning them seems unreasonable. There's nothing else to do.
Despite efforts by the class representative and monitor to maintain order, the classroom becomes chaotic. Laughter and noise seem capable of lifting the roof, causing confusion in one's mind. However, this liveliness makes students comfortable after being suppressed for so long.
Suddenly, Jimmy feels something poking his back. Turning around to check, the student behind passes him a note from Cai Ni. Knowing that Cai Ni, a three-color dog (pervert), can't utter anything decent, Jimmy decides not to bother reading it. He crumples it and attempts to throw it away.
Jiani quickly snatches the note, waving it teasingly in front of Jimmy. Unexpectedly, she points at the words "Dare to kiss her, I'll treat you to dinner" and asks Jimmy what they mean. Jimmy's face instantly turns red, and many people behind laugh louder. At this moment, Jiani seems to sense something and stops questioning.
People always feel happy times pass quickly, just like students feel classes without teachers fly by. Before they know it, the bell rings again. Even diligent students feel they've gained nothing from the class.
It's lunchtime, and unfamiliar with the surroundings, Jiani follows Jimmy to the cafeteria. Jimmy happily agrees, thinking at least they won't feel lonely in the cafeteria. At least it won't ruin the scenery.
Thus, Jiani follows Jimmy, lost in thought, almost bumping into a senior student. She isn't sure what she's thinking, just wandering aimlessly.
For some unknown reason, Jimmy usually feels the walk from the classroom to the cafeteria long when alone, but now it feels quick. Perhaps he realizes there's someone beside him, especially someone as elegant as Jiani.
Sitting on chairs in the cafeteria, they don't say much, chatting casually. After finishing their meal quickly, Jimmy leaves, returning to the classroom to continue reading his favorite novel. Meanwhile, Jiani pays attention to this seemingly aloof boy. She guesses Jimmy must have secrets he doesn't share and perhaps she can help him.
Then Jiani also returns to the classroom. At noon, all students go back to their dormitories to rest, leaving the vast classroom empty. Jiani quietly rests her head on the desk, watching Jimmy read, and inadvertently laughs out loud. At this moment, Jimmy realizes his awkwardness.
He clumsily wipes tears from the corner of his eyes, stammering to Jiani, "This little story is too touching." Jiani seems to understand.
"In fact, everyone has one or two touching stories related to themselves; we just don't know how to uncover them."
Jimmy looks up at the slightly dark-skinned Jiani, his heart softening suddenly, feeling like finding a lifeline, so joyful and excited. He thinks: perhaps this girl named Jiani can be his warm reader.
This quiet noon, when others sleep, the two chat about their dreams, future, and even secrets in the classroom. Jimmy's revelations are beyond Jiani's expectations. Gradually, she understands Jimmy's inner weakness and offers her sincere, sisterly love, gradually influencing Jimmy's lonely heart.
One or two hours pass quickly. Students return to the classroom one by one. During this noon, Jiani hasn't had enough time to fully understand Jimmy but knows she needs to treat Jimmy well in the coming days, using her warmth to heal his wounds. Perhaps only this way can make him lively and appreciative of himself. Jiani silently contemplates.
Thus, Jimmy tells Jiani about everything he has endured, revealing his fragile heart often shattered. Sharing everything with Jiani, he believes she won't mock his stories. He even feels Jiani is worth entrusting completely.
The afternoon schedule brings excitement. Why? Except for music and physical education, the rest are all self-study periods. Although the homeroom teacher might visit a few times, it's definitely less boring than regular classes. Finally, Jimmy's face shows a rare smile. He thinks: finally, he can read his favorite novels freely and boldly.
During music class, the teacher lets students entertain themselves by singing. Immediately, the class erupts in joy. They might enjoy relaxing this way or hope to exchange non-academic things.
"Teacher, according to Jimmy, his deskmate sings beautifully," Cai Ni smirks mischievously, making a funny face at Jimmy.
"Is that so? Then Jiani, please sing a few songs for all of us," the teacher says. Actually, the teacher doesn't know Jiani personally but has heard from other teachers that she is self-reliant and progressive. He assumes Jiani won't refuse.
Jimmy can't contain himself, yelling for the first time in class, "Whoever wants to sing can sing, don't drag others along." The classroom falls silent momentarily.
Jiani instinctively tugs at Jimmy's sleeve. Naturally standing up, she clears her throat and sings "Let's Love Each Other Well." They are astonished. Even Cai Ni falls silent, listening intently to this girl's beautiful voice, feeling somewhat unfamiliar with her.
After the song ends, the classroom fills with prolonged applause, filled with affirmation and encouragement. They didn't expect Jiani to have such a melodious voice, not even Jimmy knew until now.
Amidst everyone's admiration, Jiani quietly sits down, smiling at everyone. Lifting her head, she sees Jimmy looking at her questioningly, making her feel somewhat shy. She smiles faintly at Jimmy, stirring a subtle tremor in his heart. He doesn't know what this feeling is.
Joyful classes always end quickly in the blink of an eye.
As soon as the bell rings and the music teacher steps out of the classroom, mysteriously, several classmates approach Jimmy and Jiani, praising Jiani's singing skills and envying Jimmy for having such a talented deskmate. This makes Jimmy feel a weak, somewhat baseless pride. Perhaps it's the first time after being arrogant for a long time that he feels unashamed.
"Just so-so! It's my fate!" Jimmy pretends to be helpless, sighing dramatically at the end. Though appearing worried, he can't hide his inner joy. People are often like this, enjoying praise but pretending humility. Jimmy is no exception.
"Ouch, sour! Got rewarded but still putting on airs!" Cai Ni, who enjoys fooling around with Jimmy, teases.
"How about we switch seats?" Cai Ni continues asking Jimmy, seemingly serious. But Jimmy finds it hilarious, wondering why a pervert would say such nonsense. Out of politeness, Jimmy shakes his head and casually says, "No way." Cai Ni leaves cheerfully, leaving Jiani quietly laughing at Jimmy's seemingly petty anger. She finds it amusing.
The next class is physical education, but the teacher doesn't show up. The only outdoor activity period is temporarily converted into a self-study session. Students are somewhat reluctant. Someone shouts.
"Why don't we let Jimmy's someone sing a song?"
"Who is Jimmy's someone?"
"Are you stupid? Who else? Of course, it's Jiani!"
Everyone chimes in, making Jiani blush. But Jimmy feels a subtle comfort. This sensation seems unprecedentedly pleasant, and there's a subtle shift in his heart. However, Jiani doesn't know.
Self-study sessions during physical education require silence, or it might attract school leaders, leading to undesirable consequences. Thus, the quiet classroom becomes silent. This silence seems unwilling.
Jimmy can't concentrate on his novel. He secretly writes on a piece of paper, "Jiani, your voice is so melodious! Hehe..." and gently pushes it to Jiani, who is doing her homework.
Jiani smiles at him, drawing a smiling face with her pen and writing, "Do you like it?" before pushing it back.
Jimmy doesn't know why, but he feels unprecedented warmth. Looking at the smiling face Jiani drew and the words she wrote, a mysterious heat rises in his heart.
"Yes, I like it, but I wonder until when I can hear it?" Jimmy pens thoughtfully, wanting to see how Jiani responds. He hopes to find something memorable in her reply.
After reading the note, Jiani doesn't rush to reply. Instead, she looks at Jimmy, startling him. He doesn't understand why Jiani suddenly stares at him this way. Despite his curiosity, he doesn't delve deeper but waits for the note.
"As long as you like, anytime is fine." Jiani writes cautiously on the paper and gently pushes it to Jimmy, smiling at him. At this moment, Jimmy cares little about anything else, focusing only on Jiani's reply.
Holding the note, Jimmy feels a slight disappointment. He didn't expect Jiani to reply this way. But this also gives him a tiny sense of happiness. At least, Jiani is by his side now.
Jimmy carefully folds the paper and puts it in a box, smiling slightly at Jiani. Then he takes out his favorite novel and quietly reads it, his bored expression betraying his furtive glances at Jiani. Distracted, these actions go unnoticed by Jiani.
Finally, Jimmy can't resist the strange feeling inside him. He takes out a piece of paper and scribbles on it, trying to write a poem for Jiani. Poetry best reflects one's current state of mind.
"You quietly enter my sight; the curtain blocks the affectionate eyes. I silently stand beside you, searching for that magical feeling in your breath. Your voice drowns out everything. I don't know if you can read my