I laughed so hard............ A man went to the toilet and had just closed the door when he heard a neighbor ask: "Are you here?" He said, "Yeah." But in his heart, he thought, who is this guy next door? Do I know him? Strange! Then the neighbor asked again, "What are you doing here?" He angrily said, "Pooping! What else would I be doing here?!" The neighbor then asked, "When are you leaving?" He thought, this person must be crazy! Annoyed, he said, "I'll leave after I'm done!!" At this point, the neighbor asked again, "Can you come over here later, okay?" This man was shocked inside: Shit! It's a homosexual! He cursed loudly, "Go die, you freak!" The neighbor then said, "Alright, let's hang up first. I'll call you back later to adjust my endocrine system. There's an idiot next to me who keeps interrupting me!!" A woman was walking at night when she suddenly saw a man open his arms towards her as if to embrace her. She kicked him right away. The man cried on the ground, saying, "This is the third time! Adjust my endocrine system! Who have I offended? Why is it so difficult to take a piece of glass home?" Ge You goes to the toilet. Once, Ge You invited friends for dinner. On his way back from the toilet, he found a big wet spot on his pants. Friend: "Why are your pants wet?" Ge You: "This often happens since I became famous." Friend: "Often like this?" Ge You: "Of course! Often people peeing beside me suddenly turn around and shout: 'Isn't that Ge You?'" A real joke happened on Lucky 52, even Li Yong fell over laughing! PART1: A couple was guessing the name of a food item. The wife gestured while the husband guessed. The word "steamed bun" appeared on the big screen. Wife described: "Round, white, edible." Husband: "..." The wife continued describing: "Just white, soft, you ate it last night!" The husband, clearly flustered, blurted out: "Mimi!" Li Yong fell over laughing... Asking for money. Once, I took a bus home. After getting on, I found no one-yuan coins in my wallet, so in a hurry, I put a ten-yuan note into the coin slot. Later, I felt more and more frustrated, so I negotiated with the driver whether he could let me stay by the door and take the money that the next station's passengers should put into the coin slot? The driver agreed. The bus soon arrived at the next station, and many people were rushing to get on. I blocked the door and said to the first passenger: "Give me the money, adjust my endocrine system." The other party was stunned: "Why?" After a few words of explanation, I said, "Just give it to me, don't worry about anything else." The other party looked at the driver, and the driver nodded in agreement. Thus, I got one yuan. Following the same method, I quickly collected eight one-yuan notes. Then a big man came up, broad-shouldered and muscular, with a shaved head and tattoos. Seeing me blocking him, he angrily asked, "What are you doing, buddy?" I said, "I'll tell you later, give me the money first." The other party's eyes bulged: "What did you say?" I said, "Give me the money!" The other party opened his mouth wide and asked the driver, "What is this kid doing?" The big man blocked the door, and the people behind couldn't get on. Meanwhile, the people in the carriage were eager to leave, so everyone started shouting, "What are you chatting about! Give the money!" The big man quickly caved in. Only to see him pull out his wallet from his pocket and hand it over, looking dejected and saying, "Boss, this is all I have. You're many, I surrender." A greedy little dog jumped onto the dining table to look for food and found a roasted chicken. Just as it was about to eat, the owner suddenly shouted: "If you dare touch that chicken, I'll do the same to you!" So the puppy licked the chicken's butt. A female colleague from our unit went to the bank yesterday by bus. There was a young woman dressed very brightly on the bus. A pervert approached, stood behind her, and kept touching her body. The woman was furious and turned around to curse loudly, "What are you pushing for??!!" At this moment, the bus was quiet. After a few seconds of silence, the perverted man replied, "One push." Everyone on the bus burst out laughing. Our colleague said that there were a few boys who originally wanted to help the girl, but they also couldn't stop laughing. When the bus stopped, the pervert got off. Once while shopping, I suddenly felt a stomachache, so I walked into the all-you-can-eat hotpot restaurant on the street corner to borrow the toilet. However, I couldn't find it on the first floor no matter where I looked, so I ran upstairs. The second floor was still under renovation, empty without any furniture, but I found a restroom door with a sign that read *Out of Order, Please Do Not Use*. I really couldn't hold it anymore, regardless of the three or two things, since there was no one around, I pulled down my pants and squatted over the toilet... what a relief!! After finishing, I went downstairs and found no one there. It was strange because during dinner time, the place was full of guests before. Even the waiters and receptionists were gone... So I approached the counter and asked, "Is anyone here? Where has everyone gone?" At this moment, a male waiter crawled out from under the counter and said, "*!... Didn't you see when the poop fell from the ceiling and hit the fan? Lucky you weren't there!" An escapee fled from the prison where he had been detained for fifteen years. He broke into a house to look for food and money and found a young couple in bed. So, he ordered the husband to get up and tied him to a chair. Then he tied the wife to the bed and gave her a long kiss on the neck before going into the bathroom. While the escapee was in the bathroom, the husband said to the wife, "Listen, this man must be an escapee; you can tell just by looking at his clothes. He must have been in prison for too long, not seen a woman for years, and you can tell from how he kissed your neck. If he wants to sleep with you, don't resist, don't complain, do what he says, and satisfy his every demand. He must be extremely dangerous, and if he gets angry, he might kill us both. You have to endure, baby, I love you." The wife said, "He didn't kiss my neck; he whispered in my ear. He told me he was gay and thought you were cute, and he asked me if we had any Vaseline at home. I told him it was in the bathroom. You have to endure, baby, I love you too... In a remote mountainous area, a woman was promiscuous. Not long after her marriage, her husband went out to do business, and the woman was having an affair with her lover at home. Halfway through, they heard footsteps outside, so the woman hurriedly made her lover wear a sheepskin coat and hide in the sheep pen at the back of the yard. Her husband returned and pulled the woman to want to have sex, but the woman refused. The husband, unable to contain his hunger, went to the back yard and grabbed a sheep. Coincidentally, this sheep was the woman's disguised lover. After a passionate session, the husband returned to the room satisfied. In the middle of the night, he got up and went to the sheep pen again to vent his frustrations. In the morning, the husband got up and recalled the previous night, thinking the sheep had a special flavor, so he went to the back yard again, grabbed the sheep, and was about to act when the sheep suddenly stood up and spoke: "Are you fucking crazy? Am I the only sheep in the sheep pen?" During high school, a buddy in the class, born in 1981, wasn't old, but looked really old..... Here's something that happened to him on the bus: In the second year of high school, this buddy took the bus to school. Because the journey was long, he was bored, and a man around 35 years old sitting next to him started a conversation. The man immediately asked, "Brother, where are you going?" This buddy, maybe used to such treatment, wasn't particularly surprised, and calmly answered, "No. 3 Middle School." The man's second sentence: "Oh, are you going to see your child? It's tough for students..." That buddy twitched his face slightly and didn't say anything. Third sentence: "Brother, how old is your child?" That buddy was really annoyed and didn't bother to explain, casually replying, "Freshman in high school." At this point, the classic moment occurred. The man looked at that buddy with wide eyes in surprise, staring for a full ten seconds before saying, "Brother, you got married pretty late, huh!"