★I have already unconditionally surrendered to you, so please sign the love contract.
★Do you want roses? I will not give them to you! Do you want to eat chocolate? I will tease you until you crave! Do you want me to kiss you? Never in your dreams! Oh new land, don't be angry, I just want to fool around with you!
★Clumsy man + clumsy woman = marriage; clumsy man + smart woman = divorce; smart man + clumsy woman = extramarital affair; smart man + smart woman = romantic love; Us?
★When getting up, I recall your smile, when washing face, I smell your scent, before going to bed, you are my need, I really can't forget you... My dear toilet!
★I am ugly but very gentle, I am thin but full of muscles, my heart is soft but my legs are long, I will definitely pursue you, even if it's to the end of the world.
★I don't know how you are today, but my situation is not good. I only feel that front and back, left and right, inside and outside of my mind, it's all buzzing with thoughts of you. Do you miss me?
★Before a woman gets engaged, she is like a swallow, flying freely. After engagement, she is like a pigeon, able to fly but afraid to go far. After marriage, she is like a duck, wanting to fly but lacking the strength.
★Before a man gets engaged, he is like a grandson, obedient. After engagement, he is like a son, learning to talk back. After marriage, he is like a father, giving orders.
★You are a sentimental crow; you are an active frog; you are a lotus root emerging from mud without being stained; you are a fiery red shrimp in my heart; I want to gently greet you... the little fool reading my text: Are you happy today?
★Your eyes blink once, and I die; they blink again, and I come back to life; they keep blinking on and off, and thus I die and live repeatedly!
★Do you like me? If you do, scroll through the messages... Hmm! I know you like me, I will carefully consider your feelings!
★Forgive me for telling a stranger your phone number, his name is Cupid, he said he would tell you: I am fond of you, I care about you, I am waiting for you.
★A wife is like China Telecom, stable but hard to take out; a mistress is like China Mobile, convenient and fast, but requires extra money and compromise; a lover is like China Unicom, novel, but often out of service.
★Thank you for knowing each other in this life, I am deeply infatuated with you. I am sure you are the one I seek in this life. Without you, my life is dull and lifeless. I need you so much, come back to me: Renminbi!
★Men are born with sins, work cannot be tiring, dates should be paid by you, sweet talk must be memorized, and all mistakes are your fault.
★Your face is more beautiful than Chen Shimei's, your eyes brighter than Zhuge Liang's; my feelings are longer than Guan Yun Chang's, and my promises emptier than Sun Wukong's!
★Is separation good? I don't want to be bothered by you anymore. We might have a chance to be together in the future. I still like you, why are you still bothering me... Hey, does anyone know how to undo this safety belt?
★Every day I pray to heaven for a rose that blooms forever, and when there are 999 more, I'll give them all to you and say passionately: I bet the bees won't sting you!
★What is pride? Being a cow! What is humility? Pretending! What is frugality? Being stingy! What is intelligence? Blowing one's own trumpet! What is beauty? You!
Playful Messages
The dark night sky hangs with a crescent moon, white hands hold flowers, our meeting is a myth, since we both care for each other, let's get married!
I'm happy to worry for you, I've been heartbroken and drunk with love, I dare not change or be promiscuous, I don't want to confuse you, writing this is very tiring, I fear most that you are indifferent.
You are water, I am sand, we mix into muddy clay. You are a hook, I am a cross, together we are a pair of little rivals!
I fear nothing, I fear no earth, I only fear the teacher coming to my home. Sitting on my stool, drinking my tea, once the teacher leaves, mom beats me.
My love is like stars in the sky, too many to count; my affection is like cabbage stalks, impossible to cook away; you treat me like a beggar, showing some affection then running away. Excuse me, show more affection.
It's a great honor to meet you, people from all directions no longer matter; women admire your beauty, you possess charm and sincerity; seasons meeting in spring bring joy, quickly moving forward as a righteous person, sharing happiness and sorrow for many centuries.
I really want to hold your hand and walk the revolutionary path together. How should I express it? Don't think I'm ugly!
Meeting you makes my heart beat faster, not seeing you makes my mood worse, dreaming of you makes time pass quickly, possessing you is a long-awaited expectation?
You are the crow flying ahead in the sky, I am the dog following on the ground; you are the crab crawling sideways in the sea, I am the pea chasing on the ground.
Your face is so bright, your person so wonderful, thinking of you makes my heart race, liking you makes me nervous, I don't know how to forget you.
Just meeting you made me so happy, guessing your heart left and right. A heart that never changes, even at 100 years old, I will watch the stars with you.
I am ugly but gentle, I am thin but full of muscles, my heart is soft but my legs are long, you are a bit plump but very full, especially your smile is truly beautiful.
In the year of the snake, the stock market is being strictly monitored, oh no. Rogue traders are acting like hooligans, run! Fortunately, some good funds step in to support, and get stuck.
Red and sweet is watermelon, quick-tongued is cucumber, croaking is frog, reading the message is a fool.
Rival, rival, I hate you, secretly luring away my honey; I won't hit you, I won't scold you, unless you love her thoroughly, otherwise I will tear you apart!
Smiling, smiling, smiling until your teeth fall all over the ground! Have a sweet dream tonight, in which I smile at you!
White rabbit white and white, two ears standing up, hearing the mobile phone beep, put down radishes and cabbages, reply quickly!
Life laughing moves my heart, pursuing you for a lifetime is sincere, others pursuing you worries me, harming my focus on work, always most sincere to you, never changing my heart in life.
Sister loves brother endlessly, meeting afar better than hometown, sister feels the same for brother, will not betray your one-sided affection, Cupid ties us together, becoming harmonious mandarin ducks.
Green mountains and clear waters are lovely, beautiful women everyone admires, for the next generation of the country, we must fall in love.
Men at twenty are semi-finished products, at thirty finished products, at forty fine products, at fifty top-notch products, at sixty superior products, at seventy finished products, at eighty commemorative products.
Spring is not for studying, summer heat is good for sleeping; autumn has mosquitoes, winter is cold, wanting to study wait till next year.
Mathematics tires me greatly, physics is continuously wrong. Studying really makes me look haggard, energy is about to collapse! Only online am I not left behind!
Exam zero points is a goose egg, doing bad things is a bad egg, empty-headed is a dumb egg, being fired is a rolling egg, cursing people is a turtle egg, alas dying is a wasted egg, the one reading the short message now is a fool.
You insult me, I endure, because I fear your wife having a litter of monkeys. There may be jumping ones, hopping ones, and ones who foolishly grin after reading the message.
Eat free meals if you can, eating turns you into a fool. Fools don't eat for free, not being foolish means not eating for free. Not being foolish but pretending to be, looking again makes you a fool!
Wearing a hat on your body, shoes on your head, chewing socks in your mouth, holding a mobile phone in your hand, staring with a pair of eyes, trying to find fun inside.
Having level, no temperament, is a sage; having level, having temperament, is a virtuous person; no level, no temperament, is an ordinary person; no level, having character, is a bad person.
Secrets to finding a job: age is a treasure; diplomas are indispensable; connections are most important; ability is a reference.
Hospital four flowers: queuing for registration, dazzling eyes; doctor's diagnosis, scattering flowers; medicine fees, seeing flowers in fog; long-term treatment without cure, wasted money.
Internet years fly like knives, each knife mercilessly making people old. Physical health is most important, don't stay up all night online. To take care of your health, sleep before two o'clock. QQ space, cloning QQ space, QQ space code, QQ space modules, QQ space diary
Grades don't need to be high, passing is enough; learning doesn't need to be deep, being able to copy is the key; this is the classroom, only my quiet heart matters; failing in studies, listening in music class, thirst quenched with Sprite, tiredness relieved at the disco.