Our young children practice writing compositions mostly in four ways. Articles about scenery should also be novel.
How to make the description of scenery novel:
- Ingenious and exquisite pictures
- Lively and interesting language
- Unique and novel structure
- Descriptions with changes between stillness and motion
- Rich associations and imagination
- Articles that blend scenes and emotions
The scope of writing about scenery is very broad, including celestial bodies, flowers, trees, rivers, clouds, mists... All natural landscapes can enter our pens and be written into our articles.
Teacher Wu's lecture
How can we make the description of scenery novel?
1. Ingenious and exquisite pictures
Writing about scenery is also called describing scenery. It involves capturing the characteristics of the scenery and depicting them in detail to create ingenious and exquisite pictures.
1) Three-dimensional descriptions with color, shape, sound, and momentum.
Look, the sea tide has arrived:
Around one o'clock in the afternoon, a rumbling sound came from afar, like thunder rolling. Immediately, there was an uproar among people. Those familiar with the river tide told us it was coming. We stood on tiptoe and looked eastward, but the river surface was still calm, showing no signs of change. After a while, the sound grew louder, and a white line appeared at the horizon where water met the sky. People became excited again.
That white line moved forward quickly, gradually stretching and thickening, crossing the river surface to form a wall over six meters high. The waves drew closer, like thousands of white warhorses galloping together in a vast procession. The sound was like that of thousands of tanks moving, creating a deafening roar as if the earth itself were trembling.
Guangzhou Hualan Biotechnology Co., Ltd. Shen Bing, a woman as flexible as water. Initially, her love with Xiao Meng resembled that of ordinary lovers in every city—loving each other, enjoying simple happiness, striving for housing and life. However, they chose a city like Beijing. But could this be considered a mistake? If it weren't for that apartment, if it weren't for that down payment of 80,000 yuan, if it weren't for Xiao Meng wanting Shen Bing to live a life where she didn't have to look at prices when shopping, perhaps they wouldn't have deviated from their original lives.
This passage vividly describes the magnificent scene when the tide arrives: there is sound—the rumbling sound from afar, like thunder rolling; the sound is like that of thousands of tanks moving, creating a mountain-splitting roar as if the earth were trembling. There is form—that white line moves forward quickly, gradually stretching and thickening, crossing the river surface to form a six-meter-high white wall. There is color—the white line, white warhorses, white walls. There is momentum—the waves draw closer, like thousands of white warhorses galloping together in a vast procession, the sound like that of thousands of tanks moving, creating a mountain-splitting roar as if the earth were trembling.
When writing about tides, it is done this way, and when describing other scenery, it should be similar. Scenery should be described from various angles. What you hear, see, think, and feel should all be specifically described to depict colorful pictures and capture the characteristics of the scenery.
2) Focus on distinctive scenic spots
When writing about scenery, one should focus on the features of the scenery. For example, when practicing to describe the beauty of mountains, one should focus on the distinctive spots of the mountain. For instance, when writing about Mount Huang, one should focus on the clouds and rocks of Mount Huang. A child described it this way:
I have visited the snow-covered Changbai Mountain and climbed the fiery red maple leaves of Xiangshan, but I have never seen this "clouds marvelously peculiar, mountains mysteriously strange" Mount Huang. Mount Huang is truly marvelous, delicate and graceful, indescribably varied in form, wondrously beautiful, making one doubt whether it is naturally formed or carefully crafted by skilled artisans as a potted landscape; Mount Huang is truly high, undulating continuously, towering into the clouds, looking down from the top, the clouds float beneath your feet; Mount Huang is truly perilous, peaks standing upright, bizarre rocks scattered everywhere, cliffs steep like cut, rocks sharp like broken, almost vertical stone steps, even from afar, making one's heart race, seemingly falling off the cliff if one stumbles, being crushed to pieces.
I have seen cirrus clouds resembling horse tails, cumulus clouds resembling mountain peaks, floating clouds in the sky, but I have never seen this cloud sea of Mount Huang resembling a flowing river in the human world. The clouds of Mount Huang are truly white, white like a piece of silk, just like freshly fallen snow, so clean, so moist, with a unique charm; the clouds of Mount Huang are truly still, still enough that you don't feel their movement; the clouds of Mount Huang are truly long, so long that you cannot see the end, only feeling how vast it is, like a large curtain covering heaven and earth; the clouds of Mount Huang are truly wonderful, wonderful because they are elusive, giving ample room for imagination, evoking beauty. This is truly "flowing continuously for three thousand feet, suspected to be the Milky Way descending to the human world."
Here, the young author focuses on the detailed depiction of the features of Mount Huang's mountains and clouds. The clouds and mountains in the article are unique to Mount Huang and not found in other mountains. The features of Mount Huang's mountains and clouds highlight what only Mount Huang can present, allowing readers to immediately recognize it as Mount Huang rather than another mountain. This is a successful and novel description. Such writing expresses the young author's admiration for the great rivers and mountains of the motherland.
Excellent Work Review: Mount Huang
People say, "After returning from the Five Great Mountains, one does not look at other mountains; after returning from Mount Huang, one does not look at the Five Great Mountains." I also had the opportunity to come to Mount Huang and admire its magnificent scenery.
I have visited the snow-covered Changbai Mountain, climbed the fiery red maple leaves of Xiangshan, but I have never seen this "clouds marvelously peculiar, mountains mysteriously strange" Mount Huang; Mount Huang is truly marvelous, delicate and graceful, indescribably varied in form, wondrously beautiful, making one doubt whether it is naturally formed or carefully crafted by skilled artisans as a potted landscape; Mount Huang is truly high, undulating continuously, towering into the clouds, looking down from the top, the clouds float beneath your feet; Mount Huang is truly perilous, peaks standing upright, bizarre rocks scattered everywhere, cliffs steep like cut, rocks sharp like broken, almost vertical stone steps, even from afar, making one's heart race, seemingly falling off the cliff if one stumbles, being crushed to pieces.
I have seen cirrus clouds resembling horse tails, cumulus clouds resembling mountain peaks, floating clouds in the sky, but I have never seen this cloud sea of Mount Huang resembling a flowing river in the human world. The clouds of Mount Huang are truly white, white like a piece of silk, just like freshly fallen snow, so clean, so moist, with a unique charm; the clouds of Mount Huang are truly still, still enough that you don't feel their movement; the clouds of Mount Huang are truly long, so long that you cannot see the end, only feeling how vast it is, like a large curtain covering heaven and earth; the clouds of Mount Huang are truly wonderful, wonderful because they are elusive, giving ample room for imagination, evoking beauty. This is truly "flowing continuously for three thousand feet, suspected to be the Milky Way descending to the human world."
Such clouds surrounding such mountains, such mountains supporting such clouds, plus colorful clouds in the air, lush pine forests on the mountaintop, fire-red maple forests in the mountains, clear springs gurgling below, making you feel as if you are walking into a continuous painting, this is truly "the sun shining on the incense burner produces purple smoke, looking afar the cloud sea surges among the mountains, strange mountains and exotic trees wrapped in clouds, all the beautiful scenery returns to Mount Huang."
Review of Excellent Work: The young author uses a general-part-general method to structure the entire article, first summarizing the magnificent scenery of Mount Huang, then separately describing the mountains and clouds of Mount Huang, finally ending with a beautiful poem describing the cloud sea, strange mountains, and exotic trees of Mount Huang. The same structural approach is used to depict the features of Mount Huang's mountains and clouds. The mountains are characterized as strange, tall, and dangerous, while the clouds are white, still, and long. These features are described using parallel structures, making the logic clear. Extensive use of metaphors makes the article vivid and lively, giving the reader a sense of being there. Rich imagination makes the article both specific and substantial. Throughout the article, the young author expresses admiration for the great rivers and mountains of the motherland.
2. Lively and Interesting Language
Appropriately using various rhetorical devices such as metaphor and personification can make the description of scenery more vivid.
First, let's talk about metaphors. A metaphor compares one thing to another with which it shares similarities, also known as drawing comparisons. When used appropriately, metaphors are easy to understand and can make the described scenery more beautiful and moving, leaving a deep and vivid impression on the reader.
To make metaphors appropriate, one must learn to associate while observing: think about what the scenery resembles. Then consider where they are similar, finding the similarities between the two. The more accurate the similarity, the more precise the metaphor. Similarities can generally be considered from several aspects—outline similarity, color similarity, sound similarity, length and size similarity, dynamic similarity, etc.
Please look at the following metaphor:
Spring is like a fairy in a fairy tale. The tender green deciduous pines on the mountaintop resemble the fairy's scarf. The green trees on the mountain resemble the fairy's green robe, with the blooming white pear blossoms dotted on the green robe like flowers. The cherry blossom clusters below the mountain resemble the fairy's flower skirt. The patches of dandelion flowers at the foot of the mountain resemble the fairy's yellow embroidered shoes.
The metaphors here are simple and easy to understand, combining metaphors with personification to increase the liveliness and interest of the article, effectively expressing the young author's affection.
Personification refers to using imagination to write about things as if they were human. Using personification to describe scenery makes the scenery more vivid and lifelike, enhancing the article's appeal. To use personification, one must find the similarities between the scenery and humans. For example:
In spring, the mountain streams begin to thaw, and the stream water that has been pent up all winter can now sing freely again.
The sound of the stream is similar to human singing, making this personification correct.
Using personification requires assigning human-specific emotions, expressions, actions, and language to the scenery, directly treating the scenery as human. We often read such sentences in descriptive articles: "flowers open their smiles; lotus flowers dance gracefully in the pond; grass plays hide-and-seek with me; woodpecker doctors treat patients." "Opening smiles," "graceful dancing," "playing hide-and-seek," and "treating patients" are all human expressions and actions, applying them to scenery makes it come alive, enhancing the article's appeal.
Review of Excellent Work: I Love My Hometown's Stream
My hometown is in Nangangdi Village, Xingtang County, Hebei Province. There is a stream beside the village, winding around the nine-peak Lotus Mountain. The stream flows down from the mountain spring, clear and bright, like a transparent silk ribbon, fluttering towards the distance. It follows the terrain from high to low, "tinkling tinkling" strumming strings, "splashing splashing" singing songs, then winding around the hillside and flowing eastward. There are many small fish, shrimp, and frogs in the water.
Next to the stream are terraced fields. In spring, layer upon layer of terraced fields are filled with golden rape flowers and lush wheat seedlings, looking from afar like colorful chains. Farmers in the fields weed and fertilize, working diligently. On both sides of the stream are apple trees, pear trees, jujube trees... all in bloom, and the water in the stream seems to be covered with colorful clouds.
Autumn comes, geese fly south, and farmers swing their sickles to harvest golden rice. Apple trees, pear trees, and jujube trees are laden with "red carnelians" and "golden ingots," bending the branches under their weight. Do you know, sometimes ripe fruits fall into the stream with a "plop"!
Since the reform and opening up, in our rural areas, people have taken every possible measure to use the water from the stream to irrigate crops and fruit trees, ensuring bountiful harvests year after year. The clear water of the stream often reflects the smiling faces of people who come to drink from it.
This stream flows quietly all year round, like a colored film, capturing and photographing the beautiful scenery on both banks. As the scenery on both banks changes, so does the picture in the water, becoming more and more beautiful...
Ah, I love my hometown's stream!
Review of Excellent Work: The young author uses fresh and natural language to depict the clear and beautiful scenery of the hometown stream and the people's deep affection for it. Whether it is the clear and bright spring water, the tinkling water sounds, the small fish and shrimp in the water, or the five-colored clouds reflected in the stream in spring, the golden fruits falling into the stream in autumn, or the smiling faces reflected in the stream, it feels like a gentle breeze brushing against your face, giving a sense of "a lotus emerging from clear water, naturally without any carving." The young author uses fresh language and a fresh artistic conception to recreate the poetic and picturesque beauty of the hometown stream. The emotional expression at the end conveys the young author's love for his hometown.
3. Skillfully Infusing Emotion
Infusing one's thoughts and feelings into the described scenery is a commonly used method in writing exercises, and it is something that should be learned and mastered. Infusing emotion into the scenery means expressing the author's genuine feelings when writing about scenery. For example, admiration for natural landscapes, intoxication with magnificent views, love for the mountains and waters of one's hometown. Only by infusing one's feelings into the described scenery can the article have appeal, move the reader, and be written in a novel way.
How to infuse emotion into the scenery?
(1) Directly express feelings while writing about scenery.
1. Directly express one's feelings about the scenery at the beginning or end of the article. For example, the beginning and end of the article "Mount Huang":
People say, "After returning from the Five Great Mountains, one does not look at other mountains; after returning from Mount Huang, one does not look at the Five Great Mountains." I also had the opportunity to come to Mount Huang and admire its magnificent scenery.
Such clouds surrounding such mountains, such mountains supporting such clouds, plus colorful clouds in the air, lush pine forests on the mountaintop, fire-red maple forests in the mountains, clear springs gurgling below, making you feel as if you are walking into a continuous painting, this is truly "the sun shining on the incense burner produces purple smoke, looking afar the cloud sea surges among the mountains, strange mountains and exotic trees wrapped in clouds, all the beautiful scenery returns to Mount Huang."
The young author directly praises Mount Huang and expresses feelings at the beginning and end of the article, strongly expressing admiration for Mount Huang.
2. Repeatedly chanting and progressively expressing feelings about the scenery throughout the text.
The young author of the article "Mount Huang" used this method. When writing about the mountains, three sentences were used consecutively: "Mount Huang is truly marvelous," "Mount Huang is truly high," "Mount Huang is truly perilous"; when writing about the clouds, three sentences were also used consecutively: "The clouds of Mount Huang are truly white," "The clouds of Mount Huang are truly still," "The clouds of Mount Huang are truly wonderful." Each repeated chant expresses feelings first. By repeatedly chanting and progressively deepening, the young author fully expressed love for Mount Huang.
(2) Imbuing feelings in the words and lines.
In the article "Mount Huang's Stones," the writer describes the strangeness of the stones without ever using words like "love" or "like" to express emotions, yet after reading the article, we can feel his affection.
The stones of Mount Huang are truly strange! Mount Huang not only has numerous amusingly shaped peaks and stones, but also many magical stones—the five-colored sandstones that glow when ground into powder and scattered into fire, emitting light and sound like molten gold, scattering five colors like the halo atop a Buddha; the harp stones—varied in size and thickness like ancient harps, producing pleasant music when lightly struck; the fragrant sandstones in the pools atop Tian Du Peak and the moon pool atop Lotus Peak, glowing at night with a fragrant scent like the fragrance of lotus and osmanthus flowers.
Mount Huang's stones originally do not speak and have no feelings, but under the pen of the young author, the stones glow, play music, and have scents! The stones of Mount Huang seem to become a fairy tale world, reading along, one can't help but exclaim "The stones of Mount Huang are truly strange!" This is all because the author infused their feelings into the specific depictions of each scenery, infecting the reader with that deep sentiment.
It is evident that to infuse feelings into the scenery, the key lies in carefully observing the scenery and meticulously depicting its characteristics. The more specific and vivid the depiction, the more it reflects the author's feelings towards the scenery.
3. Clear Thought Threads and Novel Article Structures
For articles about scenery, sometimes they need to be written in the order of visiting or touring, requiring the observation position and tour route to be specified during writing. Because the same scenery viewed from different positions will have different characteristics. For example, in the article "Mount Huang's Stones," the clever stones are described differently depending on the observation point: from the Half Mountain Temple looking up at the clever stones on Elder Peak, it is "Golden Rooster Crowing at Heaven's Gate," but looking back from Dragon Cricket Slope, it becomes "Five Elders Ascending to Heaven's Capital"; on the steep cliffs of Lotus Bud Peak, there is a clever stone called "Crickets Climbing the Wall." Looking from above, it becomes "Jiang Taigong Fishing," and looking a bit higher, it becomes "Immortal Descending from the Sedan Chair"...
From this, it is clear that the scenery observed will present different characteristics depending on the observation position, whether viewed from afar, nearby, level, upward, or downward. Therefore, when observing scenery, attention should be paid to selecting the right observation point; when describing scenery, the observation position must be clearly stated.
Specifying the observation position can generally be done in two ways: One, if you are standing at a fixed point to observe the scenery, you can specify your position at the beginning of the article. Two, if you are observing while moving, you can specify your movement route in the article. For example, in the article "Touring ×× Mountain," after first summarizing the characteristics of ×× Mountain, the sequence of going up the mountain, hearing and seeing at the waist of the mountain, climbing to the top, and going down the mountain is sequentially explained. This way of specifying the shift in observation position closely combines stepping and changing scenery, resulting in a tightly structured article with