My grandfather passed away.

Isn't going to school really that important? (I will not discuss the issue of schooling itself for now, because teachers or students in universities basically know what schooling is all about; as for me, even facing the college entrance examination does not seem so important. ) We can ignore major and minor events happening at home, including parents' illness, relatives' death, all of which will affect the great cause of students' schooling, which should not be the case. Family members do not say, students do not know, as a member of the family, they do not even know that their parents are unemployed or relatives have passed away. I don't know how other protected students feel, I just want to say that I am very angry.

I remember when I was in high school, I called home once a month. Basically, every time I called home, I could ask about things that caught my attention, such as my sister finding a boyfriend, then having a child, my father finding a job after being unemployed, and various other information, all of which I learned occasionally by calling home. I think if I didn't ask, no one would tell me voluntarily. Maybe after reporting safety at school at the beginning of the semester, there would be no need to call home again. Every time the family concluded with "you just study well, you don't need to worry about things at home." It's helpless, it makes me feel heartbroken. I remember doing a reading comprehension exercise, which was about a mother sending her child to school. In order to pick something (I can't remember clearly), because it grew on a cliff, she fell off the cliff once, I don't know if she broke her leg or died. The child found out later, by then he had already been admitted to a good school (seems like). In short, the article was promoting maternal love, the mother sacrificed for the child, hiding her own condition in order for the child to study peacefully (for example, suddenly getting a serious illness, or an accident, etc.), and the final outcome was the revelation of true feelings. At the time, I was moved looking at myself, but now thinking about those things makes me angry. This mother is too great, this child is too filial!! Parents always think they are doing what's best for their children, hiding things, telling white lies, but is this really good? Is that rumor necessary? Even more tragically, I've seen some reports saying that parents working hard far away from home earn money for their children to skip class and play video games.

At 7:30, my grandfather passed away; at 8:15, my sister sent me a message telling me my grandfather had gone. Before 5 o'clock, I called my father and asked about my grandfather's condition, he said he was not doing well, I said I was just asking, he said "you just study well, don't worry about things at home", I said how could I not care, then the phone was hung up. Then at 8:20, I called my father again and asked where he was, he said he was at home, I asked again, and he hung up. Then I called my mother, no one answered. Then I called my cousin, my uncle answered, he said my grandfather had gone, then the firecrackers went off, then I could only hear the sound of firecrackers. After hanging up the phone, my anger burst out.

I think what has been taken away from me is not the right to know, but the right to grieve, the right to love. They love me, but ignore my love.

Suddenly, I associate with myself, I have also concealed many things, although now I have improved a lot compared to before, but there are still many contradictions in my heart. I care about not wanting the other party to worry, and I worry about knowing what the other party may hide from me out of concern for me, which is very contradictory. But I start to learn to weigh, which small things can be hidden, and which big things should be told.

There are too many parents in China who selflessly think for their children, regardless of arranging life aspects, they absolutely do not care about their children's feelings, do not take the initiative to communicate, do not reflect, and never know what their children are doing. For example, me, I don't care that my family ignored my right to know, but I cannot tolerate them completely ignoring my feelings and emotions, and imposing their ideas on me. Regarding my grandfather's passing, I am not very sad, but what makes me sad is my family's attitude towards me and towards schooling. In fact, even during the preparation period for the college entrance examination, if such important things happen at home, I would go home first. Of course, I spent the whole summer vacation at home, basically going to my grandfather's house every day, so my mood is relatively calm now. Even if I was told, I would be sad, so what? Even if I am sad and can't change anything, so what? Even if it affects my studies or work, so what? Isn't it the same when I find out later? If I can't change the facts, can't I change other things? Will everything be fine if I study well and work well? I can't change much, but at least I won't have too many regrets in my heart. Some things can be done again, but some things are unique, only once. I am thinking about how the good student who returned home after being admitted to a key university and found that his mother had already passed away spent the rest of his life. Did he ever regret, did he ever feel guilty?

What should we value in life? At least, for me, feelings, people's emotions are the treasures we should cherish the most. There is not much explanation needed, I am just angry that studying is placed more importantly than family affairs. Someone consoled me, saying that the family didn't call because they were afraid I would worry and be sad, I said why did they call my sister then, is my sister stronger in bearing capacity? The only explanation is that they thought I was studying and didn't want to disturb me. I was extremely angry, but I couldn't call back and scold my family.