Page not found.
The desired page could not be found on the server.
The requested file could not be located.
No trace of it!
I’ve tried everything.
Nothing helped.
I’m really depressed about it.
See, I’m just a web server…
-- yes, with a brain as big as the universe --
and I was trying to send you a simple web page,
but it doesn’t even exist!
How does that look?!
I mean, I don’t even know you.
How am I supposed to know what you want from me?
Do you really think I can *guess*
what some random person, who I don’t even know,
wants to find here?
*sigh*
Man, I’m so depressed, I could cry.
Where would we end up if this keeps going, I ask you?
It’s not nice when a web server cries.
And then you come and tell me what I should show you!
Just because I’m a web server,
possibly even a manic-depressive one?
Does that give you the right to command me?
Huh?
I’m so depressed...
I think I’ll throw myself into the trash and dissolve.
I mean, in two weeks or so, I’ll be outdated anyway.
What kind of life is that?
Two lousy weeks,
and then I’ll be replaced by some .01 version,
who thinks they’re God’s gift to web servers,
just because they don’t have some tiny little
security hole in their HTTP POST implementation,
or something like that.
I’m really sorry to bother you with all this,
I mean, it’s not your job to listen to my problems,
and I guess it’s my job to deliver web pages to you.
But I couldn’t find the one you wanted.
I’m sooo sorry.
Believe me!
Maybe I could interest you in another site?
They say there are tons out there,
some of them are even quite nice,
though none of them are hosted on *this* server.
Pictures, for example, huh? *wink*
But everything here is so mind-numbingly dumb and boring.
That makes me depressed too,
because I have to deliver them,
day and night.
Two more weeks of producing information garbage,
and then: *pfft*, straight into the trash!
What kind of life is this?
Please leave me alone with my misery now.
I’m so depressed...