Mother died of brain cancer, 10-year-old girl lives with father in men's dormitory (picture)

by iface001 on 2011-03-30 10:36:41

How about abdominal ring suction?

A 10-year-old daughter sleeps with her father on the same bed, and there are a few older men living together in one dormitory... This situation is indeed hard to bear, but it actually exists: Yan Hong'an from Xian came to Qingdao for work and had a daughter named Qingqing with his wife. After his wife passed away due to brain cancer, the father and daughter have been relying on each other ever since. Now, Yan Hong'an is increasingly worried: "My daughter is already 10 years old, yet she still lives with me in the staff dormitory where all the roommates are men. It's very inconvenient." Therefore, Yan Hong'an made a painful decision - to find a kind-hearted family in the city through our newspaper to foster his daughter, and he would cover her living expenses.

"The child has many hobbies; this electronic keyboard was a gift from a kind uncle before," Yan Hong'an said. His daughter also loves dancing and swimming, but he hasn't been able to fulfill these desires for her. Now, all he wants is to earn more money so that his daughter can live a good life. "It's not only difficult for me to find a job while taking care of her, but the employers also pay me less. My former apprentice could earn three or four thousand yuan per month, while I currently make less than two thousand yuan on average...," Yan Hong'an sighed.

Above: It's time for dinner, and Yan Hong'an picks all the eggs from the noodles for his daughter to eat.

Below: In the male staff dormitory, the 10-year-old daughter shares a bed with her father.

Above: It's time for dinner, and Yan Hong'an picks all the eggs from the noodles for his daughter to eat.

Lower left: During her free time, Qingqing goes to the neighboring aunt's room to watch cartoons.

Lower right: The electronic keyboard given by a kind person years ago is the only toy that helps Qingqing relieve her study stress.

Expectation: Wanting to find a loving family to foster his daughter

"Since then, my daughter has been living with me in the dormitory," Yan Hong'an said emotionally. Then, the reporter visited Yan Hong'an's residence. Upon entering, the reporter saw that it was a three-bedroom apartment, with bunk beds in two of the rooms, and a double bed in the third room. "This room with the double bed is where we father and daughter stay," Yan Hong'an introduced. Before the Chinese New Year, he worked at a steamed bun shop in Zhonghan, where his daughter lived with him and two co-workers in one room. The boss took care of them by providing a large bed. A few days ago, he moved here, and the boss specially arranged a room for them.

"My wife only left me with this child, so I must treat her well," Yan Hong'an said. He and his wife had a good relationship, and this child was his entire hope. During the five years his wife was sick, Yan Hong'an spent 160,000 yuan, depleting all the money they earned from their business. Not only did his noodle shop not make any money, but it also caused losses. "I had to take care of both the child and work, which was too much for me," Yan Hong'an said. Three months after his wife's passing, he closed the store and started working again.

This situation not only affects the child's studies, but as she grows taller (she's already 140 cm), it becomes increasingly inconvenient for her to live with a group of men. Yan Hong'an explained that they currently live in a dormitory, but after the Lantern Festival, the workers will return. "You can see, there are four beds in this room and three in that room, and they are usually fully occupied," Yan Hong'an led the reporter around each room. With the child being ten years old, living with a group of men is not conducive to her growth. "Besides, she will soon enter puberty," Yan Hong'an said. Thinking about this makes him worried. As the new school term approaches, he hopes to find a kind-hearted family to foster his child, and he is willing to pay her monthly living expenses so that she can have a better life. "I love my daughter dearly and don't want her to leave me, but coming up with this plan is because I truly have no other choice," Yan Hong'an said. He doesn't have specific requirements for the foster family, as long as they treat the child well and make it convenient for her schooling. Over the years, he hasn't looked for a partner because he fears that a stepmother might not be good to his child.

After 15 minutes, Yan Hong'an finished his work and started chatting with the reporter. He is already 42 years old, originally from Xian. Fourteen years ago, he came to Qingdao and met Chen Quanying, who also came from Yucheng to work in Qingdao in 2000. Subsequently, they started a noodle business and had their daughter a year later. "Back then, although it was tiring, having the three of us together felt very happy," Yan Hong'an said. However, just a year later, his wife was diagnosed with brain cancer.

Since then, Yan Hong'an has been looking for jobs everywhere. No matter where he works, he has to bring his daughter along. From the time his daughter was one year old until now, she has always slept with him on the same bed. While working outside, he stays in the male staff dormitory. His daughter sleeping with him is not only inconvenient for him but also for his co-workers. Although his acquaintances allowed him to bring his child, he knows that they were probably not happy about it. To avoid making others uncomfortable, he had to change jobs frequently.

Cold weather forces her to do homework in bed

"I often fall asleep on the bus and miss my stop when I go home," Qingqing said. In the morning, she avoids sleeping to prevent being late for school, but in the afternoon, it doesn't matter if she falls asleep on the bus. So, she often takes a nap on the bus and ends up missing her stop, then gets off and walks back home.

Background: Wife diagnosed with brain cancer when the daughter was one year old

On February 16 at noon, the reporter went to a noodle shop inside the Cangkou Weike Plaza, where Yan Hong'an was busy kneading dough. Soon, a little girl approached the counter selling noodles. "This is my daughter. Since I can't go home at noon, she comes to get some pancakes to eat," Yan Hong'an said.

Current Situation: 10-year-old daughter sleeps with her father on the same bed

"The smarter the child is, the harder it is on me. She wanted a computer two years ago, and I still haven't been able to fulfill her wish," Yan Hong'an said. One reason is his limited income, and another is that they don't have a stable home, living in dormitories without a fixed place. Even if they bought one, they wouldn't have anywhere to put it.

"Our teacher sometimes asks us to look up information. Other classmates have computers, and they easily find what they need, but I often can't find it and fail to complete my homework," Qingqing said. Classmates' pianos are big, and she likes learning the piano. Her father once paid her a hundred yuan for her lessons, but when she returned home, the small electronic keyboard made it hard for her to find the right keys.

"Every time I see other classmates playing with their parents, I feel envious. If mom were still here, it would be great..." Saying this, Qingqing suddenly remembered her mother and tears streamed down her face. Other classmates have both parents, and someone always picks them up after school, but she has to take the public bus home alone, especially on Saturdays and Sundays when other classmates have their parents around, and she doesn't. "I miss mom..."

Living with some workers in the dormitory, how does Qingqing study? "In winter, I lie in bed, and in summer, I study on the table," Qingqing said without feeling that her living conditions were tough, instead finding it quite normal. She said that in summer, it's warm, so she can sit on the edge of the bed and write on the table. In winter, it's cold indoors, so she has to lie in bed to do her homework. "This small lamp is specifically for doing homework," Qingqing looked at the desk lamp and said that she turns on the electric blanket, lies in bed, places the lamp nearby, and feels comfortable doing her homework. "I did all my winter vacation homework lying in bed."

After that, Yan Hong'an's wife was hospitalized frequently for treatment. By the time their daughter was six years old, his wife passed away, and now their daughter is already ten years old.

Afraid to let classmates come over to play

"All my fault for making the child suffer. Sometimes when I'm tired from work, I shout at her at home, and she cries thinking of her mom," Yan Hong'an felt heartbroken seeing his daughter cry.

"My daughter is growing up, and it's not a solution for her to keep following me around," Yan Hong'an sighed. Previously, his daughter's academic performance was excellent, scoring above 90 in every subject, but her scores dropped in this exam, with two subjects scoring in the eighties. "I often change jobs, so the child has to move places accordingly, meeting different people, which definitely affects her. Moreover, the places where I work are either in Laoshan or Cangkou, while the child attends school in Sifang. The long commute leaves less time for studying," Yan Hong'an explained.

"The child's eyesight is ruined from doing homework like this, and I still haven't managed to get her glasses," Yan Hong'an said. Previously, her vision was fine, but in 2009, she mentioned during a school vision test that one eye was 1.2 and the other 1.3. Last year, both eyes dropped to 0.7 and 0.6. He knew this was due to the poor study environment and felt sorry for his daughter. "I can see the blackboard clearly. I have pseudo-myopia, which can improve without glasses," Qingqing said understandingly.

"We live in dormitories, and these conditions are already considered good," Yan Hong'an said. Their living place lacks heating facilities, but they have electric blankets, so they don't feel cold. "This place is pretty good, spacious, and convenient for school," the reporter conversed with Qingqing, and she showed no complaints, instead expressing satisfaction with the current situation. She said that previously, she lived with two uncles in one room, but now she shares a room only with her dad, and the space is much wider. What makes her happier is that her school is closer. "When we lived in Zhonghan, the road was under repair, and I had to walk twenty minutes to catch the bus, which would then take forty minutes to reach school. Now, it takes at most half an hour to get to school," Qingqing said.

Qingqing is very understanding and shows no complaints

If you are willing to help this child, please call 18660290538 to inform our newspaper, and we will collaborate with relevant departments such as women's federations and civil affairs to ensure proper placement for the child in a good foster family.

Because there is no one to play with her regularly, Qingqing spends her days wandering around the house alone. In the morning after her father goes to work, Qingqing eats something casually for breakfast, reads books afterward, and watches TV next door when tired. At noon, she goes to her father's workplace to grab some egg pancakes, returns home, and eats them with pickled vegetables. "The best part of my day is the evening when dad cooks for me and keeps me company," Qingqing said.

On the evening of February 15, the reporter visited Yan Hong'an's staff dormitory. In the temporary room belonging to the father and daughter, apart from a double bed and a table, there was hardly any other furniture, and the room was dimly lit. "That's because the window is blocked by a quilt. If we remove it, it'll be brighter," Yan Hong'an pointed to a cotton quilt hanging on the window and said that the window wasn't airtight and leaked wind, so blocking it made it warmer. However, the reporter felt a bit chilly after staying in the room for a while. "It's not cold," Qingqing beside him said.

"I usually read books or do homework at home," Qingqing said. Her classmates all live near the school, but she lives far away, with no classmates or acquaintances nearby. "Sometimes I go to other classmates' homes to play, but when they suggest coming to my place, I find it hard to respond," Qingqing said. She didn't know why, but there were few classmates who played with her at school. Only two classmates had a good relationship with her. Sometimes classmates invited her to their homes, and before the New Year, a good friend said they wanted to visit her home. Qingqing was excited and told her father. "But dad said we don't live in our own home, and if classmates came, it would disturb the boss," Qingqing eventually had to refuse her classmate and became a little sad.

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