A "Bastard's" Love Story

On an autumn night, the flowers have all bloomed. I stood by the window carefully tearing up the petals of old blooms, then painfully gathered them with great solemnity. Since I need this atmosphere to tell a new story, but yet somehow forgot it, perhaps it wasn't real, or maybe it had been a long time since it happened.

I climbed my way into university along my life path. There was a small group of young people like me inside. When we first entered school, we had plenty of energy and money, many ideas and experiences. We drank lots of beer in the dorms, spent days playing cards, made prank calls to other dorm rooms, and sang rock songs outside the toilets... People didn’t care to do anything, in reality, any action seemed beneath us. We were just a bunch of troublemakers who appeared very happy, though deep down there was always some sadness.

At that time, we all started going online, so the school BBS became quite chaotic. It was then that I met her. She said she was pretty, and I said I was handsome; she said she was on the volleyball team, and I said I was the captain of the soccer team; she said she often danced at school dances, looking very dignified, and I said I often rode my motorbike around, looking very cool... Then she said we should meet in person, as chatting like this was getting tiresome. I thought about it and said sure, I'll be waiting for you on the grass in front of the library, riding my motorcycle.

That afternoon, I wore one of my dad's small shirts and rode my mom's 26-inch bike while pretending to look nonchalant on the grass. The sun cast a rich yellow glow over me, and then I saw a rather beautiful girl in a red dress walking by. I was the only one on the grass. She looked at me curiously and asked, "Did you see a guy who looks like Beckham riding a motorbike?" I said, "No, but the person you described might be me. I'm waiting for a net friend. Are you her?"

She stared at me disappointedly for half a minute and said, "You're lying, everything you said is not true."

I replied, "It's not entirely false. My nickname is 'Handsome Guy,' but actually, all the girls on our floor call me that, which more includes a sense of encouragement; I am indeed the captain of the school team, but it's the tug-of-war team; I named my own bicycle 'Wild Wolf' because it's broken enough, and I often race after class not for excitement but to leave early..."

After hearing my explanation, her expression didn't improve, but her mouth was speechless. I thought she must want to scold me, so I sincerely said, "If you want to leave, go ahead, or you can make some noise and run away. I won't blame you, and that way I won't feel too guilty either."

She laughed through tears and said, "It's not that bad. Since we've come, let's find a nice place to chat." I said, "Don't bother," and she said, "Alright, it doesn't matter anyway." So I thought of a nearby bar with a fountain and suggested we go there.

The bar was surrounded by lush green trees, very graceful. Better still, there weren't many people. I happily stood there for a while before realizing something was wrong—there was a newly built toilet next to the bar, and its smell was very strong, which explained why there were no customers.

We drank water beside this simply designed toilet while people walked by adjusting their belts. She sweetly said, "This is the place you chose?" I awkwardly smiled and said, "Well, it's convenient for using the toilet..."

She bit her lip and couldn't help but say, "You really are an idiot."

Finally, the truth came out, making everything clear. I sighed in relief and said, "Yes, there are people in this world who, no matter what they do or don't do, are seen as idiots. People look at them and inexplicably feel annoyed. Those who stand out and are extraordinarily good become giants, and the leftovers become idiots, like me..."

Is that so? She smiled sarcastically and said, "I want to see how much of an idiot you are."

"That might require some observation," I replied.

"Haha, you're quite cunning. Alright, people should observe each other for a while," she said.

I didn't expect that I could meet her regularly. Although I couldn't be sure if there was some scheme involved, I thought I should express my gratitude to her, perhaps by giving her a gift. Then I thought about gifting her a pair of goldfish.

When I handed her a fish tank, she happily said, "It's so beautiful. How did you think of giving me this?"

"Because it's cheap, only ten yuan," I replied.

She glanced at me and smiled, saying, "You really are an idiot... Hey, why is this fish floating on its back? Is it dead?" she suddenly shouted as she poked at the water plants.

"That's a side-swimming fish, it swims like that," I said.

"Is that so? A side-swimming fish?" She curiously stared at the fish and said, "It's quite cute, strange and peculiar, with a big belly, greedy... Let's call it 'Idiot,' what do you think?" She seemed satisfied with that decision and told me happily.

"Alright..." I said, "Then let's call the beautiful one your real name?"

"Hehe..." She laughed without answering. "Idiot" swam leisurely in the fish tank, it was beautiful but didn't attract attention, it was greedy but didn't demand to be fed, and thus was unjustly called "Idiot."

Because of these two goldfish, and because she wanted to know how much of an idiot I was, we often spent time together. I felt we were even about to fall in love. She invited me to the lotus pond at school to discuss why I was an idiot. This pond was a nice place, who knows what we would discuss there.