Not mentioning you does not mean that there are no memories of you in this world, and not thinking about you does not mean I have truly forgotten you. I do not want the days to be as decadent and painful as they were 16 years ago, or even for there to be a "sacrifice of feelings" —— a term mocked by modern people but one that indeed exists in my mind. Thus, I spent the entire summer dazedly in the courtyard, expecting to be summoned away by you.
I don't know how handsome you are now because your appearance is forever frozen at the age of 15; I don't know where you are now because I truly do not know where the so-called heaven or hell actually is.
I have grown up and will not just cry anymore. Therefore, I especially allow myself, during special festivals, to miss someone like you in a unique way.
Miss you! Miss you! Vaguely miss you, commemorating you in the form of words. My incense, candles, paper offerings, and money still remain unknown as to where they should be placed and in which direction they should be lit. Thus, I still use this method to think about you.
Thinking about you, I no longer cry... After Qingming, I will return to being my real self again.
Related thematic articles: Allow myself to miss you (3) Allow myself to miss you (1).