When washing clothes, I wanted to spit and there was a toilet nearby. As a result, I accidentally spat into the washing machine, so I had to wash the clothes by hand... Once, I took my IC card to take the bus, the person in front of me put coins in, and I short-circuited my brain and threw the IC card in too... Once, I was hungry and thinking about what to eat when my roommate came out of the toilet saying she felt comfortable after pooping. I then thought about how long it had been since I last pooped and absentmindedly said to her: "Oh, you're so lucky, I haven't eaten poop for such a long time"... In the morning, I was going to wear contact lenses, but when I opened the cover, I dropped the lens into the toilet. Then, I calmly poured new solution in and prepared to take out the lens... but couldn't get it out for a long time... While brushing teeth, I splashed some water on my clothes and wiped it with a piece of paper. After wiping, I threw the toothbrush into the trash can... Once, I ordered pizza and waited at the door. I was talking on the phone with a friend when the delivery guy asked if we ordered the pizza. I said no. He insisted that it was our address. He asked how many households were in this house? I said none, sorry, I'm on the phone, can you... Then he looked very upset and called the store while getting back into his car. It was only then that I remembered... I ran after him... The other day, I went downstairs to throw away the garbage... When locking the door, I thought it was troublesome to hold it in my hand... Unexpectedly, I put the garbage bag into my beautiful big bag... I sweated... What's more annoying is... I carried it all the way to the company!!! Fortunately, there wasn't much liquid inside!!! Once I went to KFC, while walking and taking out money and coupons, I also held a tissue in my hand. With three things in my hand, I decided to throw the tissue away. Without looking, I threw something into the trash can. When I was about to enter KFC, I found that I was holding the coupon and the tissue, but the hundred-dollar bill was gone. I turned around and ran back to the trash can and picked up the money from the trash can. Fortunately, the trash can was right by the door... Once, I had a high fever and had to get up in the morning to wash up before going to work. I originally planned to squeeze toothpaste, but I accidentally squeezed facial cleanser onto the toothbrush and thought while brushing: today's toothpaste tastes a bit strange... Once, my neighbor forgot to bring the key and climbed over from our balcony. After finding the key in the room, he climbed back in an exaggerated manner and then calmly opened his own door. More embarrassingly, I was waiting for him on the balcony the whole time and didn't feel anything was wrong... Alas, both our brains must have been squeezed by the same crack in the door... Yesterday, I thought there was scale in the bathtub, so I used Mr Muscle to scrub the bathtub. After finishing, I casually placed it on the edge of the bathtub. When I bathed at night, I grabbed Mr Muscle and poured it on myself, thinking while pouring: why is this shower gel so diluted, who added water? Realizing what I did, I hurriedly washed it off with water. I don't know if it's because my skin is thick, but I haven't shed any skin until today... When I was a child, I once ate candy while doing homework, and carelessly piled the candies on the side. I threw them into my mouth without looking. Later, I found one that had no taste, but I didn't pay attention at the time. When I made a mistake and couldn't find the eraser, I realized that the tasteless 'candy' I chewed earlier was actually an eraser... My colleague did this once. In the morning, he had a plastic bag full of snacks in his left hand and another plastic bag full of garbage in his right hand. In the morning, he opened the garbage can and threw a bag in with a "bang". Then, he leisurely took the other bag to the company. At noon, when he was hungry and wanted to eat snacks, he opened the cabinet and found a bag of garbage inside... When entering the subway gate, I took out my mobile phone and frantically swiped it on the gate, and kept telling the people waiting behind me that it wouldn't work and that the machine might be broken... Sweat... Twenty years ago, my mother proudly rode a 28-inch Phoenix men's bicycle to send my sister, who was over a year old, to kindergarten. When she arrived at the kindergarten, she gracefully kicked her leg back like a mantis and felt that she hit something. She didn't care and pushed the bike forward, but after walking a few steps, someone shouted from behind: "Comrade, this comrade..." My mother turned around and saw that my little sister, who was over a year old, was lying on the ground in a sitting position, stunned. For the next twenty years, my sister refused to ride my mother's bicycle, and this hatred lasted for more than twenty years... I like to eat all the sunflower seeds... Unconsciously, after eating all the seeds, I dumped the sunflower kernels in the trash can and stared blankly at the other plate of sunflower shells... My mother often does such elegant things. Back in the day, our door lock was a hanging lock. One day, she went to work early at 5:30 am. I don't know what she was thinking, but she locked the door and locked my father and me inside the house, and it was a working day. When my father got up early and tried to open the door, he found that it couldn't be opened and was quite frustrated. Fortunately, our neighbor had our house key, so my father called the neighbor grandma to let her open the door for us. I was still in bed at the time, listening to my father make the call, and I laughed crazily! When I got home in the evening and told my mother, she didn't believe it and said: "Could I do that?" Later, after asking the neighbor, she finally believed it! This event has become a big joke for us now! One day, I found my mobile phone missing, searched through my bag and every corner of the house, but failed. Then I sat down in frustration and took out my phone from my pocket, sending mass text messages to everyone: "I lost my phone..."... The monitor was on standby, I shook the mouse, but it was still on standby. I shook it hard for a while and realized that I was shaking my phone... Rode a bike to buy stuff, went into the store without locking the bike. After buying the stuff, I locked the bike and was ready to leave... When I was a kid, I liked biting pen caps. One day, I bit it and felt something was wrong, it was very salty, and then I discovered I had sucked a mouthful of ink... Once, after peeling an apple, the peel didn't break and I was very proud. I accidentally threw the apple into the trash can and started eating the peel!... While frying eggs and tomatoes, I cracked the boiled egg on the bowl for a long time but it didn't break, and I told my wife the egg was bad... Last time I had a cold and needed an injection, the nurse asked me to take off my pants and I almost pulled them off completely... Once in the office, I was dizzy and wanted to go to the bathroom, but unconsciously walked to the purified water machine. Seeing half a bucket of water, I suddenly unzipped my pants... Suddenly, I realized what I was doing and quickly zipped them back up, pretending nothing happened as I returned to my seat. Fortunately, there was no one around. Later, I thought it might be due to being too busy at work... During a picnic, I took out the last cigarette from the pack and lit it, directly throwing the Zippo lighter into the big fire and putting the cigarette pack back into my bag. I continued roasting meat, and later a bunch of sparks exploded, burning two people's clothes and ruining two bowls of dumplings... Mistaking the mobile phone for a lighter to light cigarettes... Using the mobile phone as a TV remote control and pressing it wildly... When cooking, the phone rang... After answering the call, I directly put the phone in the vegetable basin... And ended up in the pot together with the vegetables... Then I stared at the phone in the pot for a long time before rushing to take it out... Fortunately, I was stir-frying lettuce at the time... If it was Mapo Tofu... it would have been disastrous... In university, I went home with my roommate. After entering, we changed clothes together. Suddenly, I saw a cockroach, and she pia-ed it. Then she held the cockroach's corpse to scare me. I was very afraid of insects, so I panicked and ran out of the door. She excitedly chased me... All the way to the elevator entrance, we "woke up" and realized that I was only wearing underwear, and she... was only wearing panties... Fortunately, there was no one in the corridor... On the way, I held a big umbrella. When I entered the lobby of the company, I politely nodded to the security guard and walked a dozen steps before realizing I was still holding the umbrella. I clearly felt confused looks from behind. Fortunately, I came early when there were few people, otherwise it would have been a big joke... Once before eating, I went to the restroom to wash my hands. Upon seeing the mirror, my brain short-circuited and I automatically picked up the cup and toothbrush, humming a tune while brushing my teeth... On the first day of work, someone called the manager (female). I gave the phone to the manager and casually said, "Mom, someone's calling you"... Once in a PHOTOSHOP class, I was texting my boyfriend while courageously shouting loudly to the teacher: "Husband! My computer isn't connected!" The noisy classroom instantly became quiet. After five seconds, everyone burst out laughing. The teacher was a fifty-year-old little old man.