In the winter of 2009, I lost a six-year love. This feeling started in winter and also ended in winter. Now, reminiscing about the past days with him, I feel this winter is bone-chillingly cold. I see friends around me getting married one by one, and I also see more breakups. Suddenly, I wonder why love is so fragile? Sometimes it's more easily broken than a glass vase. Yet, it's also so strong that even when it has inflicted wounds all over my body, I still love blindly, never regretting. Six years, I've been happy, sad, and in pain. We didn't break up because we were unsuitable for each other, nor did we break up because we didn't love each other. The reason for our breakup was just one sentence: "I don't have the ability now, I can't make you happy." Because of this reason, he could easily betray me. Because of this reason, he discarded his original promise to me and left me behind. Because of this reason, he made me go on blind dates. Because of this reason, he told me: "When I become capable, I will come back to you, marry you." He gave me despair, then gave me hope. After breaking up, he still wanted to keep in touch, but we couldn't talk about feelings. How selfish, is this love? If he doesn't love me, why didn't he break up decisively? If he loves me, why didn't he stick it out until the end?
He kept insisting that he still loves me. That he will cherish and spoil me for a lifetime. But his promises to me were always unfulfilled. When a man truly loves a woman, shouldn't she be in his dreams? Shouldn't his efforts be directed towards making his woman happy? Why doesn't he want to struggle with me in the same city?
After reading many posts, I found that there are quite a few women who have had similar experiences as mine. Men, with just one phrase - "I'm not capable", abandon their women. They give up on their original promises, leaving the women they deeply love to grieve alone. They ask the women to give them space, time, and wait for their growth. Men, how many of you can take responsibility and be accountable? For your own release, you leave the sorrow to the women. Whether she cries or stays silent, letting go or waiting, it's all wrong. And many women endure pain and委屈every day, moving forward with difficulty. They walk while healing their wounds, loving while suffering, hoping while expecting. Despite constantly telling themselves to let go, the more they try not to care, the more they care.
People who give up on others always say that time can dilute everything, because they have let go, no longer care, and for them, time is just an instant. But what about those who have been abandoned? How long is time? A day? A month? A year? Or a lifetime? In fact, it's just faded, but there's always a scar left behind.
Men, please take more responsibility and be more accountable! I believe many women don't mind if you're incapable now; they are willing to share the burden and fight together with you, just to be together.