"Someone is going to broadcast their suicide on Weibo!" Shortly after A Xin posted the photos, an alert netizen noticed something was wrong and immediately tried to dissuade her. Subsequently, a large number of netizens began to forward the post and leave messages, writing warm words in the hope of persuading A Xin not to do anything foolish.
"The first step, I've already changed my Weibo name to 'Huang Haixin Depression Recovery Period,' just so that more people suffering from depression can find me and get to know me." During her hospital treatment, A Xin would receive several, even more than ten consultation calls from patients every day, some of which deeply troubled her. A Xin knew that the cost of medication for treating depression only needed to be a few hundred yuan throughout the entire process, but psychological treatment could cost over ten thousand yuan.
"Before understanding depression, I thought I really had a mental illness," said A Xin. Later, she bought many books about depression and understood the root cause of her condition. However, at first, even though A Xin understood depression herself, no matter how she explained it to her family, she couldn't get them to understand. Consequently, A Xin's condition worsened, and she even started experiencing hallucinations such as auditory and visual hallucinations, eventually leading her to attempt suicide.
A Xin, who suffered from depression, failed the college entrance exam twice, but she taught herself professional knowledge in psychology and psychiatry. In these professional books, A Xin discovered that depression is a disease caused by chemical imbalance in the patient's brain, "This is not something that personal willpower can control, nor is it the traditional concept of mental illness." A Xin said that depression is like hypertension; it cannot simply be controlled at will and must go through a systematic process of drug and psychological treatment.
"Some people stop taking medication after three or four days because they don't see immediate results, which is incorrect," A Xin said. Anti-depressant drugs usually take effect after being taken for three to four days, so sticking to the medication regimen is the first step in curing depression. At the same time, patients with depression should seek psychological counseling at qualified mental hospitals to consolidate the effects of the medication for optimal results.
On December 7th last year at 11:10 AM, the Weibo post by the user "@duoshuiduolanjinhuankuai" (later confirmed to be A Xin, a girl from Guangzhou) read, "My stomach hurts badly, I can't go get medicine, and no one cares about me." What seemed like an ordinary complaint soon escalated into a life-and-death situation.
After discovering the severity of the situation, Sina Weibo's official Guangdong account consolidated the information and posted it, hoping to locate the individual and their relatives through the spread of the Weibo post, also forwarding it to "@PingAnNanyue" and "@GuangzhouPublicSecurity". Soon, Sina obtained her personal information from her associated blog, finding out that she originally lived in the JianShe area of Yuexiu District in Guangzhou, but now resides in the JinShaZhou community of Baiyun District. Subsequently, Sina reported the incident, and around 5:30 PM that day, "@GuangzhouPublicSecurity" replied on Weibo stating that A Xin had been found and sent to the hospital, with local police getting involved in the investigation.
In the dead of night, after gastric lavage rescue, A Xin escaped mortal danger. Afterwards, A Xin told reporters from New Express that on the day of the incident, when she was alone at home, her long-term gastric ailment suddenly flared up causing excruciating pain, so she called her boyfriend for help. Unexpectedly, her boyfriend was very indifferent. "I wanted to call him (boyfriend) to take care of me, but he scolded me on the phone and hung up," A Xin said. The severely depressed A Xin felt utterly despondent at that moment, leaving a few segments of text and images on Weibo before swallowing a large amount of sleeping pills.
"I will bravely stand up, breast enlargement food, depression is just a disease, it should be faced bravely, and we must believe it can be cured," A Xin said. Since being diagnosed with depression five years ago at a provincial hospital, she had tried seeking psychological treatment. However, for a long time, the psychological doctors A Xin saw were either too expensive or their teaching methods made her uncomfortable.
The evening after the Weibo live-streamed suicide incident, A Xin's parents gradually understood depression under the doctor's explanation. Later, her parents followed the doctor's advice and joined the systematic treatment for A Xin. According to A Xin's attending physician He Rihui, previously A Xin had mentioned in media interviews that she harbored resentment due to rough treatment by her father during childhood. To begin repairing the father-daughter relationship, He Rihui learned that A Xin had a Christmas wish involving her father dressed as Santa Claus. Therefore, last Christmas, He Rihui let A Xin's father dress up as Santa Claus, singing and dancing in the ward, sincerely communicating with A Xin. Now, A Xin openly admits that she can laugh and chat happily with her father.
Close to the end of the year, instead of rushing to clean up or prepare New Year goods, A Xin returned home and started thinking about a business plan because she intended to earn money to support more depressed patients out of despair, while simultaneously giving stray dogs and cats a warm home.
Rebirth is the biggest feeling A Xin experienced after being discharged from the hospital. "During my stay in the hospital, I not only learned to love myself more, but also to have more compassion in helping others," A Xin said. Her new beginning is inseparable from the countless friends online who cared about her, and she plans to repay them with her own actions.
"But I won't abandon it, it needs a home too," A Xin said. Besides helping depressed patients, she has another wish: to collaborate with some volunteers to provide a homely living environment for stray cats and dogs. This requires a certain economic capability, and what A Xin can do now is actively appeal on Sina Weibo for netizens to join the action to save stray cats and dogs, "I've already met many volunteers, hoping this wish will come true sooner."
After experiencing all these events, A Xin wants to tell all families of depressed patients not to lecture them excessively, and certainly not to physically or verbally abuse them. "Lectures and physical/verbal abuse will cause secondary harm to patients with depression, aggravating their conditions," A Xin said. Families should understand patients with depression and seek medical treatment early, "Doctors say I am severely depressed, and I can still be cured, so patients with moderate and mild depression have even more hope."
"They are all strays I picked up," A Xin said. Every time she sees stray dogs and cats wandering outside, she feels heartbroken. The earliest dog she adopted was abandoned by its owner due to catching distemper. Although A Xin and her friend spent 5000 yuan curing the distemper, the dog still suffers from aftereffects and frequently needs medical treatment.
Families need to learn more to reduce secondary harm
On January 16th, after a sunny afternoon following the rain, A Xin was finally discharged from the psychological department of the Armed Police Hospital after a month-long systematic treatment.
On January 16th, after more than a month of treatment, A Xin was assessed by the doctor and approved for discharge once her depressive symptoms disappeared and there was no risk of suicide. Talking about her experience in the hospital, A Xin became more convinced that depression can indeed be cured. "To cure the disease, the premise is to persist in taking medication," A Xin said. Medication can balance the chemically imbalanced brain, although taking the medication won't make you happy immediately, it will significantly improve feelings of sadness and loss.
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"Not having money for psychological treatment may still result in recovery (from depression), but having psychological treatment will yield better results." So A Xin plans to start with online clothing business, gradually developing until reaching a certain economic capacity, then sharing part of the psychological treatment costs for some impoverished patients, "I feel that helping them is my mission, it will support me to do better!"
Depression is a disease, and persistence in treatment can lead to recovery
The home of A Xin is located in an affordable housing complex in JinShaZhou, BaiYun District, Guangzhou. Inside the small and simple two-bedroom apartment, there are two little dogs and a kitten accompanying her.
On December 13th last year, after her body had recovered, A Xin was transferred to the psychological department of the Armed Police Hospital for a month-long systematic treatment. At the beginning of her hospitalization, A Xin, with a full face of smiles, requested to face the lenses of multiple city media without any pixelation, opening her inner world to those who cared about her.