Two nights ago, Xiaomei (a fictitious name), a third-year junior high school girl, stopped her life which had not yet blossomed by hanging herself. After the family discovered this, they quickly sent her to the hospital. After 18 hours of emergency treatment, yesterday afternoon, due to being strangled for too long, 15-year-old Xiaomei's heart stopped beating. At the time, Xiaomei had said that her studies were not going smoothly and she had failed an English exam not long ago.
After dinner, she wanted to talk to her mother.
What was the last straw that broke Xiaomei? Perhaps it is currently impossible to give a clear answer. But one thing is certain: she chose to hang herself just before the high school entrance exam.
At around 8 PM the other night, after Xiaomei finished eating with her mother, she prepared to review her homework. However, unlike usual, she did not habitually go into her room to read books but instead paced back and forth in the living room. Xiaomei’s mother, when introducing the situation to the emergency personnel, said that about ten minutes before the incident, Xiaomei had told her that her recent studies were not going well and hoped to have a good talk with her after finishing her homework, “but I didn’t ask further.”
Around 8 PM, Xiaomei’s mother entered Xiaomei’s room and was shocked by what she saw: her daughter had hanged herself. Regaining her composure slightly, she hurriedly called for help.
The security guard who arrived at the neighborhood afterward said that Xiaomei’s bedroom was not very large, “the computer next to the bed was still on.” Xiaomei was lying flat on the floor, her face purple. An informed person said that a thin rope was hung on the handle of the wardrobe, “possibly using the wardrobe to hang herself.”
While waiting for the emergency personnel, Xiaomei’s mother kept squatting on the ground, tightly holding her daughter’s hand and sobbing.
Her heart once resumed beating
Upon receiving the distress call, the 120 command center immediately dispatched an ambulance team to Xiaomei’s home — a residential area on North Shida Road. Around 8:10 PM that night, the emergency personnel arrived at the scene and found Xiaomei lying flat on the ground, her face purplish-blue, her breathing and heartbeat already stopped, her throat swollen from strangulation. The emergency personnel immediately began resuscitation efforts.
Opening meridians, performing cardiopulmonary resuscitation... Ten minutes, twenty minutes, half an hour passed, "the chances of survival are not very great," the emergency doctor worriedly stated. But facing the life of a young flower and the family's plea, the emergency personnel continued to perform external cardiac compression on Xiaomei.
After fifty minutes of effort, Xiaomei's heart miraculously resumed beating! Both the medical staff and Xiaomei’s mother sighed with relief.
18 hours could not save her life
But Xiaomei was still not out of danger, and the race against death had not ended. To compress the rescue transfer time to the shortest possible, the 120 doctor, while lifting Xiaomei onto the ambulance, contacted the nearest Second Artillery Hospital, informing them to prepare the emergency department. At 9:25 PM the previous night, the ambulance arrived at the Second Artillery Hospital, where the already prepared medical personnel immediately began rescuing Xiaomei. By then, her blood had already coagulated.
Around 10 PM that night, Xiaomei’s vital signs stabilized, and she was transferred to the intensive care unit of the emergency department. However, due to prolonged oxygen deprivation, her brain and brainstem suffered severe damage, her clotting mechanism deteriorated further, and she exhibited symptoms of massive bleeding.
Yesterday noon, Xiaomei’s family and her parents' colleagues gathered outside the intensive care unit of the emergency department anxiously waiting. Every time the doors of the intensive care unit slowly opened, it drew everyone's attention. A box of mineral water was placed at the door, but no one had time to take even a sip.
At around 12:10 PM yesterday, a medical staff member came out and said that two direct relatives of Xiaomei could enter for a visit. As if sensing something, Xiaomei’s parents looked somewhat stunned and followed the medical staff into the intensive care unit. “Is this their last chance to see her?” someone among the relatives waiting outside muttered quietly, the atmosphere suddenly becoming heavy. The older elders silently shook their heads and sighed, while a girl around Xiaomei’s age hugged her head and cried bitterly, “She once said she liked learning how to swim. I know she worked hard to study because she didn't want to disappoint her parents, but she overburdened herself.” This girl said that Xiaomei had psychological burdens, so every time they met, they dared not ask about her studies, “once asked, she would get extremely nervous.”
Yesterday afternoon, Xiaomei died due to prolonged asphyxiation and ineffective treatment.
Suspected failure in English exams
Relatives disclosed during their conversation that Xiaomei’s recent QQ signature was “very disheartened,” “in elementary school, her grades always ranked among the top few in the class, but after entering middle school, her grades declined, and each time we saw her, she always looked worried.”
Xiaomei’s mother said that Xiaomei had not done well in an English exam not long ago, causing her psychological pressure to suddenly increase.
Yesterday afternoon, quite a number of residents gathered in front of Xiaomei’s building. Many of the residents in the building were Xiaomei’s father’s colleagues. Mr. Li, one of Xiaomei’s father’s colleagues, said that Xiaomei’s father was a leader in a publishing house, and her mother worked in a university. Both had nice personalities and good relationships in their units. Xiaomei was lively and open-minded, “a sensible child.” Mr. Li said that all members of their family were highly educated intellectuals and had a relatively open attitude towards educating their children.
When the reporter knocked on Xiaomei’s family’s door, it was Xiaomei’s mother who opened it. She looked pale, with red and swollen eyes. When asked about her daughter’s matter, she remained silent for a moment and said, “There are still many things to deal with at home, please leave.”
Xiaomei’s father, Mr. Yang, expressed that he did not wish to talk about his daughter’s matters with others.
■ Doctor's reminder
Adjusting psychological state before important exams
As the middle and high school exams approach, candidates’ psychological pressures continue to grow. Facing challenges, facing family expectations, facing their own futures, these young lives bear immense pressure, both physically and psychologically. Scientific and reasonable methods must be adopted to cope with these pressures: scientific diet, enhanced nutrition, adjusted mindset, and appropriate relaxation. Schools and parents should also not place too much pressure on candidates, allowing children to perform at normal levels, turning this "difficult period" into the most beautiful memory of their growth rather than the heaviest burden of their lives.
■ Expert suggestion
Parents need to pay attention to children's psychological issues
Beijing Normal University psychology doctoral candidate Jianzhong Wo said that although the true reason for Xiaomei's self-harm is unclear, generally speaking, the possible causes leading to such impulsive actions can mainly be summarized into three aspects: parents having excessively high expectations, children raised in greenhouses experiencing fewer setbacks, and children's conflicting feelings about studying not being effectively regulated.
Jianzhong Wo indicated that under the current examination-oriented education environment, on one hand, parents should protect their children's self-esteem, and on the other hand, children should also self-regulate, converting their hostile emotions towards studying into challenges for themselves.
Jianzhong Wo pointed out that the proportion of teenagers experiencing psychological problems such as depression, mental breakdowns, and mania during the middle school stage is showing an increasing trend.
He suggested that parents should not only focus on their children's grades and scores but should also observe the emotional changes in their children's growth process, especially for introverted and timid ones. Once they show poor sleep or abnormal behavior, timely communication should be conducted, and those with serious conditions should seek help from psychological doctors.
■ Storytelling
“She is a child with particularly strong self-esteem”
Mr. Li, a colleague of Xiaomei’s father, said that Xiaomei liked participating in outdoor activities, and her parents provided substantial support both mentally and materially. “However, they managed her studies strictly.” Mr. Li said that Xiaomei was a strong-willed child, excelling academically in elementary school, “always ranking in the top five in the class exams,” and after entering junior high school, Xiaomei attended a key middle school, “it was said that her performance was also good.” Mr. Li said that Xiaomei had a very strong sense of self-respect, often comparing her academic achievements with the children of her father’s colleagues, “all of whom were about the same age. If her grades fell behind, she would become very unhappy.”
Ms. Qian, a neighbor of Xiaomei’s family, said that Xiaomei had a cheerful personality and was very sweet when talking to uncles and aunts, “such an incident is really unimaginable; the child's psychology is too fragile.”
■ Micro-commentary
◎Long-distance female hero: While marveling at the greatness of the emergency doctors, I also deeply lament the loss of that teenage girl. If exam-oriented education and test scores create such immense pressure on children, how can we enable them to grow up happily and healthily?
◎Xin Taizi: Social pressures are increasingly affecting younger generations! The more desires one has, the heavier the burden! How many have the normal and correct mindset to face it?
◎Choosing to forget_gray memory: May the little girl rest in peace in heaven. No matter when, life is the most important. Only by living can one have hope.
This column originates from Sina Weibo.
Reported by our journalist Qiuyu Miao and intern Hai Lei Huang
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